Mel

Please don't laugh...

2009-02-08T20:46:00.005-05:00

I don't know why but Adara got into her head that we needed to be extra careful and knock before we come into the bathroom. So she made a sign that says "please knock." Adara felt it was appropriate. It's even labeled as Adara's plan.

Then she signed all of our names, (as opposed to The Mgmt...)

Then Laurel felt that wasn't enough and made a sign that says, "Please don't laugh at peoples underpants." Just in case you do walk in, just don't look. Please.

Take a look at the sign, I feel it's rather graphic.

There is even a person laughing to the left of the underpants...

I hate bailouts.

2008-12-01T18:56:00.002-05:00

The big "bailout package" just makes me livid. I was excited that the senate opposed the bailout the first time. I thought, finally, a good, solid, smart decision that the government made.

Then they voted it in with extra whipped cream and a cherry on the top.

And now the effects are trickling down.

Congress hemmed and hawed about all this money they suddenly have to give to financial institutions, with no plan on how the banks are to spend it to get out of debt.

The banks are holding it back after they get it, and CEOs are still as cozy as can be living on outrageous bonuses.

And the people. Oh the people on mortgages who have more than enough money and are spending it unwisely, who are getting their mortgages paid through the bailout, and when they sell their house, the seller gets to buy it at a reduced price from the bank who takes the money and wipes the mortgage free and clear, with no money owed from the contracted price that the mortgagee promised to pay in order to live in the house.

Josh says, Unfortunately we are honest people. And honest people pay their mortgages, instead of letting our payment lapse for a few months, sell our house to someone for a lower price and renting for a while until the market bottoms out.

Lets screw with America. Please America - swallow our debts so we can live the materialistic and fantasy lives that enable us to pass nothing down to our children but deceit, poor money making decisions, and a must have mentality.

I'm wondering how many people who are moralistically and ethically making the worst decision of their life just for the money.

Final Tally

2008-11-29T07:26:00.004-05:00

Well the tally ended up as 100 McCain, 66 Obama, and 1 Nobama.

Guess as far as the signage goes, the tally doesn't ring true.

Good to know.

My first theory is that Republicans post more signs (or more as they usually have at least three posted in their yard, which I only accounted for one, being it was one yard. The only exception would be that there were 3 Republicans represented in one household... but hey, the system is flawed as we can see...)

I thought maybe there just weren't any outgoing politicians who went door to door with signs. I never got asked from either party. And all of the local electors who visited my door were democrats, so that kinda screws with my mentality. I guess I'm saying that in a sense we as Americans are rather lazy or overly busy, because we don't actually go to get a sign. We wait for the sign to come to us.

I'm also wondering if the Democrats being split up over Hilary impacted the signage.

All in all, an interesting test.

Wal-Mart Worker Crushed to Death on Black Friday; Union Responds

2008-11-29T07:22:00.000-05:00

Does anyone see what is wrong with this headline???

No, I'm Ewan McGregor!

2008-11-02T09:50:00.005-05:00

Josh and I started singing moulin rouge's medley, and of course I was singing Ewan McGregors part because he starts out, and I started singing first...

Me: I was meant for loving you, baby. You were meant for lovin me.
Josh: The only way for loving me baby, is to pay a lovely fee...
Me: Just one night, just one night...
Josh: There's no way , cuz you can't pay... (stopped singing) How come I have to be the whore? I want Ewan McGregor's part!
Me: No, I am definately Ewan McGregor.

How many fights start because you really just want to be Ewan McGregor???

You want to buy some death sticks?

(By wave of the Jedi hand, and hot Ewan McGregor/Sir Alec Guiness voice.) You want to go home and re-think your life.

I want to go home and... re-think my life...

Detroit

2008-10-30T17:57:00.002-04:00

I drove down to Metro to pick up my brother, and I was really surprised by the lack of Obama signs. I'm wondering now if they trying to sneak attack us by voting democratic??? Because Detroit is known to be really democratic, while the rest of the state has a higher percentage of Republicans, especially the closer you get to Grand Rapids.

Anyways there were more signs for McCain than Obama, which really surprised me being in motor city.

Potatoes for President

2008-10-30T17:37:00.004-04:00

I saw a huge sign for McCain Potatoes. I was a bit confused because their slogan is, Go for the Blue Bag... So I looked it up online...

Alas...

Paid for by 'People For A Better Potato' (AKA McCain Foods) ©2008 McCain Foods USA, Inc.
Disclaimer: McCain Foods is Not Affiliated with John McCain For President

Darn.

However the site itself is pretty halirious.

Why you should go for the Blue Bag

We don’t believe in business as usual.
With so many unique flavors and cuts, McCain is clearly the anti-establishment.

We believe in cuts for everyone.
Tax cuts are great, but crinkle cuts and wedges are so much tastier.

And my personal favorite...

We stand up against big oil.
Every McCain potato product is 0g trans fat, and requires zero offshore drilling.

Click on the issues, and check out Economy.

Potatoes for President

Maverick!

2008-10-30T17:33:00.003-04:00

Yesterday I saw my first 'Maverick' bumper sticker.

I've been entertaining Josh with how many ways that Sarah Palin can say Maverick.

And counting...

2008-10-10T15:07:00.005-04:00

With less than a month until election day the signs have been popping out everywhere. Today I almost didn't reconize the new Obama/Biden sign, because the letters on it are so small and narrow, they just blended in with all the other multi-colored signs. I had to recount on my route as I came back to make sure I had gotten the number right.

Is Navy blue in? That seems to be the color of all the signs these days...

(edited October 29th) There are newer Obama signs that are white and orange. I wonder if he saw my site and voted for change???

Another homemade sign...

2008-10-06T17:40:00.000-04:00

Marines for McCain.

Sniff.

2008-09-26T11:56:00.001-04:00

I started to feel bad for McCain as far as signage goes, but today I saw a McCain sign.

Now I don't feel so bad.

Signs every which way.

2008-09-24T17:44:00.006-04:00

I saw a homemade sign that said,

Obama for President, Biden for VP

I guess that was ambitious... or couldn't get a manufactured Obama sign.

I also once saw a state senator use old large signs for the side of his barn. I often wonder if it was to cover the wood until he could paint or side it, or if it was used as insulation. It was just humorous to me to see these enormous large signs pasted every which way going up 20 feet in the air and 20 feet across, signs that were coveted during election season, now used as barn fodder.

No one can use the words 'barn fodder' in a sentence like I can.

Vote for more signs, more bumper stickers.

2008-08-27T20:34:00.003-04:00

I've started counting the voting signs for presidental canidates. I don't count a sign twice, so here is the running tally as of yesterday.

I have one for Obama
One for McCain

And one for..... Nobama!

I thought, maybe I'll just classify this under McCain. Then I thought of all those independants and green partiers... and realized, no I'm just going to have to give this one a group of it's own... The not for obama-ers.

I'm okay with that. We need a third party anyways.

On the watch for Leno

2008-08-21T12:00:00.002-04:00

So Jay Leno has a section of his show called Headlines, where people send in funny things that show up in newspapers. Ever since I watch the police blotters or ads just to make me laugh. Todays was...

At Homer St, it was reported that the restaurant was broken into and coins from various gumball machines taken.

My question was did the cash registers not have enough in them that they had to raid the gumball machines? I think one of the pans would have cost more than what they got out of the gumball machines.

Voice of a vegetable

2008-06-16T13:44:00.001-04:00

I just found one labeled...

Squash gutz.

The voice of meat

2008-06-16T13:24:00.005-04:00

We buy meat in those huge family packs, divide it into 1 or 2 pound packages and put them in our freezer. It's cheaper, basically it's taking the labor and time of packaging it into smaller packs out of the total cost of the meat.

So I was helping him put away the meat, and being he put the sharpie in my hand, I thought it would be funny to start labeling the packages with something besides...

Beef 6/16/08

And instead put things like...

Ethel RIP 6/16/08

or

Moo. 6/16/08

or

Beef... it's what's for dinner. 6/16/08

Josh got such a kick out of this, at first, that he refused to pack the meat by himself anymore and insisted that I label them. That was until he started getting his own ideas...

One of his chicken labels was...

MAD CHICKEN DISEASE
(Don't say I didn't warn you!)
Bwahk-ha-ha-ha-brawk

or...

Private: Unfeathered

and my personal favorite...

Wings ≠ Fly - What kind of crap is that?!

The Voice of Meat series continues after this...

Tornados

2008-06-11T14:56:00.004-04:00

I used to love storms when I was a kid. I'd linger by our sliding glass door just to see if I could get a glimpse of a tornado usually by candlelight. Just the thrill of danger lurking or some kind of a natural chaotic evil about to happen seemed to interest me to no end.

That was until I had three little girls.

I decided that tornado whistles in the city are NOT a warning for adolescent thrill seeking funnel watchers anymore, but for mothering instincts to kick in and huddle downstairs in the bathroom with no windows straining to hear the tornado whistle to finally turn off while calling the electric company by cell phone and trying to keep the girls interested in playing Memory (Dora style) by candlelight.

Not as thrilling as it used to be, folks.

Michigan and Florida

2008-06-01T20:39:00.004-04:00

I like to keep up on the news. Personally my two favorite states, although Kentucky runs a close third. All those mountains...

So I read last night that the democratic party decided to split the delegates votes up between the two candidates. I think it's to basically ensure a candidate for the democratic party before they've officially split the party into two separate parties.

The party for change, and the party for not so much change...

I completely roll my eyes at the stupidity of this "lost" Michigan and Florida vote. If the law was set up this way, they should stand by it. Why vote to have the primaries moved up at the expense of losing votes knowing full well they would turn around and fight that it wasn't fairly counted? That's ludicrious.

That's politics.

I guess why this upsets me so much isn't because I would have chosen either of these candidates, but the possibility that I could have... and would have lost my right to make my vote count towards my candidate. I did stand in line at my primary and I voted. But I know there are people who didn't come to the polls because they felt they weren't going to be represented and rightly so.

My proposal? If the democratic party is going to make it count, I suggest a re-vote for the entire population of Michigan and Florida. For those independents who showed up to vote, for those democrats who wanted a voice that wasn't Hillary's, and Republicans who have the right to vote to screw the democratic party.

Hurrah for Democracy.

Mud is her passion in life.

2008-05-07T18:22:00.003-04:00

When I was a little kid, my grandparents didn't believe that I ever got dirty. I liked to stay clean and after all those christmas cards with darling clean photos of me in a dress, I guess I created the illusion that dirt was an evil beast. So after an all day in the sandbox free for all, my mom snapped a photo of me dirt and all.

When Dar walked into my bedroom exactly like this all I could think was...

Yes, Grandparents. This is your angelic granddaughter...

...and she does like dirt.

cparadise2, you bring small business' to shame.

2008-03-27T18:16:00.010-04:00

I bought, well actually Josh bought some transformers on ebay. I waited a month before emailing the seller that we haven't received the merchandise. No response. Since I paid through paypal, I had to put in a dispute through them. No response. Another 2 weeks go by. Then I had to escalate it to a claim. Still no response, but one day, paypal decides to 'investigate' and gets a shipping number by magic. So I ended up getting the transformers and now I have to leave feedback. You are able to check a box whether your feedback is positive or negative, I of course choose negative. This is what I wrote (and had to shorten it being there is only so many characters)...

Items fine once recv'd, only shipped when escalated to claim - no email replies

I actually got an email from another ebay user that hadn't received his merchandise from the same seller and he thanked me for leaving feedback. He told me that the seller actually emailed him that he was sick, for more than two months now, and he was really upset that he still hadn't received it. Josh and I found another transformers set we wanted to buy but we found it was from the same seller. He had just listed more items in the time period of his 'sickness.'

The seller decides after all he knows how to reach his computer and emails me this gem.

Reply left by cparadise2 (the seller): I was sick and not feeling well, so I sent order late.Your SILLY another ROOKIE. Your very a SILLY PERSON !

As if 'silly' is an insult. Is this person for real?

So out of the kindness of my heart I thought I could explain some sense into this poor soul. I decided concise and blunt would be the way to go.

This was the first email I have received from you, to withdrawal a negative response which you rightly deserved. Will not buy nor recommend you any ebay user, and will NOT withdraw negative feedback as it was honest and accurate.

This is what he wrote today.

So I guess when your sick it doesn't slow you down.

This is what I sent back.

I guess when your sick you can still use your fingers and type an email.

one email to tell me you were sick, BEFORE I had to escalate it to a claim was all I was asking.

How big of a jerk am I on a scale from one to ten?

Snow warning - what the weather man gets paid for.

2008-03-21T18:54:00.004-04:00

Winter storm warning for Michigan.

A WINTER STORM WARNING MEANS SIGNIFICANT AMOUNTS OF SNOW...ARE EXPECTED. STRONG WINDS ARE ALSO POSSIBLE. THIS WILL MAKE TRAVEL VERY HAZARDOUS OR IMPOSSIBLE.

Does anyone else find this redundant?

I mean, significant amounts of snow, you never see that here. And hazardous travel? While it's snowing?

Impossible.

Isn't that what he said?

Baby. It's cold outside.

2008-03-12T13:12:00.003-04:00

My co-worker, Trish, is pregnant with her first child, and invited me to her baby shower. When I told Cassie that I was going to get something for Trish's baby, she was excited.

"Oh yeah mom! We can go to the baby store and get a baby toy." She said, then she gave me this worried look. "but first, we have to go get Trish a baby."

After I told her that Trish's baby was in her tummy, she seemed a bit relieved. I called my brother to tell him about the buying a baby for Trish story, and Cassie wanted to talk to him. It went like this...

"So, mommy splaned (explained) to me that Trish has a baby in her tummy. But it's okay, because we can get a toy for the baby before he comes out."

She's got the problem solving idea down, first you get a baby then you get a toy for the baby.

There's an order to these things.

And she was pretty interested in the fact that the baby was in a temperature controlled climate in her tummy. She was concerned that the baby would not be warm enough in there. Laurel and Dar didn't have any questions about baby's when I was pregnant. Laurel was impressed that a baby showed up one day, and Dar was mad that there was a baby.

I'm actually really glad that she's my last child. I'm not sure I could handle all the baby questions.

Smoked tea

2008-03-12T13:03:00.003-04:00

Read the description. It's just as interesting as the tea (which is why I choose to buy and try it).

I'm adventurous.

And this tea is unique. There is no tea that smells like smoked salmon while you're trying to grasp what your actually tasting. I gave up the fight of trying to drink it after a few sips, and put this baby on the back burner as one of the more interesting tea drinking experiences. Its on par with drinking 'the leather tea' last year.

Coffee

2008-03-10T10:06:00.005-04:00

Today I decided that buying coffee is like smoking a pack of cigarettes each day. It definitely costs more than a pack of cigarettes. Oh wait, isn't a pack five bucks now or something (You can tell I'm not up on my smoking genre)? A Biggby coffee is only slightly cheaper (by like 50 cents), and a lot more sugar. And it's not like either are good for you or anything.

I don't buy a coffee every day. I'm lucky if I get it once a week. Not that it makes it any better that I'm spending that much for it. I do always have coupons though. And a lot of the barristas know who I am. I just like my coffee once a week. Today I met the manager. When they asked me how I was today, I told them that I was grumpy. Both the barrista and the manager stopped dead in their tracks to look up at me in shock. I couldn't help myself. Then I smiled like I was joking and he said well, that's what the coffee is for. This is what I'm hoping, I said. He even offered to carry my coffee out to my car. How is that for awesome? I should have took him up on it, Josh thinks its because my gloves were covering my wedding ring (he always thinks that someones hitting on me). I just told him that he wasn't my type, but it would solve my coffee cost dilemma.

I can think of several things that make coffee so much better. It's not like I have to go outside to drink my coffee. You don't see any signs saying 'No coffee' with a big red circle and a slash through the middle of it, or a 'This is a coffee free zone.'

People don't come up to you and say, 'Could you please put out your coffee?'

Most people don't toss their coffee cups out the window on the highway while driving.

And you usually don't see smushed coffee cups on the sidewalk.

There isn't any special sand to put your coffee into before you walk into the grocery store.

But you can get a coffee from a vending machine. It's not recommended, but for all those 17 year olds, it's gold.

Yeah, I'm not kicking my bad coffee habit. Not today.

States

2008-03-07T10:36:00.004-05:00

In 4m 59s

Click here to Play

Not only do you have to know the states, but you have to know how to spell them.

I got stuck on Illinois and Massachusetts. I was really worried that I would get stuck on the New England states. It's hard to tell them apart over there.

Freaks and Geeks

2008-03-06T18:01:00.005-05:00

I was in the drama club in high school. My friend called it the freaks and geeks club. And although you got a good assortment of those, there were many types of people who were in our drama club. We even won a state competition while I was there. "Guys and Dolls."

The most vivid memory I remember is when the male lead singing "I've never been in love before." For some reason I can hear his voice when he hits the climax of the song. I can recall seeing Nicely and the guys singing "Sit down your rockin the boat" Last minute, one of the actresses dropped out of the show for academic reasons, so a memory that sticks out in my mind is when the 'dolls' are doing their show tune and they threw in a girl who was neither graceful nor eloquent in and she knew it. She played it up and it was wildly hilarious to see her jump in, 'trying' to do all the things that the other girls were doing. It took the fun scene to a whole new level. Why we didn't have her in the show in the first place, no one quite knows.

My friend didn't understand what goes into a theatre production. The freaks and geeks of high school could turn the theatre upside down and into something great.

I still think about and appreciate all the stuff that goes on behind the scenes when I see a play. I saw 'Beauty and the Beast' and marveled at their self revolving sets. 'Momma Mia' had amazing vocalists who worked long and hard hours to perfect each ABBA song without getting laryngitis. 'Some like it hot.' had eye popping make-up artists, who transformed the men into 'ladies.' And I'm always curious on how the children are going to climb out of a wardrobe and into Narnia in "The Lion, Witch and the Wardrobe.'

So one last hurrah from this blogger for the freaks and geeks that live behind the scenes, who have truely found their calling.

Well everyone knows my cat is weird.

2008-03-06T17:04:00.002-05:00

I think I was wrong in thinking he's part dog. No, he wants to be human. He was taken away from his mom way too early and only had us to learn from.

He jumps into the tub to clean himself.

He puts his paws on the table while we are eating. And when he goes for food, (although he knows he's not suppose to) he swipes the silverware with his paws, instead of his teeth.

I've seen him trying to turn the doorknob in our bedroom.

Somehow, he got sandwiched between our front door and our metal/screen door, and Josh didn't even know he did it. The girls started giggling, and pointing out the fact that Jetta was in the door, and Josh was positive that Jetta had ran off. But sure enough, I looked out our window on the door and there he was, looking back at me pitifully.

He was probably thinking something like, "I can't believe you idiots just locked me between two doors."

He sounds like a squirrel when he's happy.

But he does really stupid things like jumping on my counters. You'd think he'd learn, first of all, there is never anything good up there. And second, I get mad when he's up there, and he doesn't like me when I'm mad. He rubs up against my legs when he knows I'm angry at him, licks my hands, and purrs as if to tell me how sorry he is, and how much he wants to have a treat. Always self-motivated.

It's true.

Hmm. I wonder who did that????

2008-03-02T20:58:00.001-05:00

Takes all the fun and mystery out of the who done it.

Intriguing

2008-02-26T15:20:00.002-05:00

Cassie came up with this gem today.

"A cat is an intriguing animal."

How many 3 year olds do you know that say the word intriguing and are grammatically correct???

Sisters, more than just blood.

2008-02-24T12:24:00.007-05:00

Well another weekend of being sick. I'm just glad there is no projectile vomiting involved.

Dar went over to my mom's house friday night and ended up spending Saturday there, because my mom didn't want to take her outside in the cold. Which was fine with us, since Josh and I were both down and out.

So today, even though Dar was still sick, she decided that she would take care of Cassie. When Cass needed a fresh cold cloth for her head, Dar would take care of it. Dar moved off our two seater couch so that Cass could cuddle up on it. And when Cassie, who woke up later than usual this morning, heard that Dar was home today, she immediately moved all of her things out to the living room to be with her.

That's the kind of love and sisterhood I always dreamed about. I have sisters, they are just so much older than me that I really don't know them. We're talking 12 years or more, so honestly we're just in different stages in our life. That's not to say that my brother is not equally as awesome as the girls are, it's just different. It's one of the major reasons that we had the girls so close in age.

And for some strange reason, I get really excited when someone asks me if they are twins.

No. But close enough.

Horses

2008-02-21T18:33:00.004-05:00

Laurel was telling a story about her day at school, while we were eating dinner tonight. It went something like this.

So there were a lot of kids being loud at library today, but Alese, Jaylyn and I were being quiet so when we got back to class, Mrs. Waddell said we could have a horsey kiss and I ate mine all up then we got our coats and went home.

A horsey kiss?

oh. A Hershey kiss. She meant a Hershey kiss. I was beginning to wonder what they really did at those schools these days.

Sometimes you really have to deceifer the code of your own kids.

Like when the girls were singing the Transformers theme song. It went like this...

Transformers

More than meets the eye

Autobots leading battle to defeat the evil horses of the deceipticons.

Must be something in the water lately.

Like horses.

Definance

2008-02-15T10:38:00.002-05:00

Today Cassie is defiant. Yesterday for lunch she wanted a piece of lasagna. She decided after taking two bites that she didn't want it, so I told her that she could put it away for dinner. So she did. And didn't want to eat it for dinner. She ate two bites. So I told her that she would be seeing it for breakfast. Out on the table this morning for breakfast was this little plate of lasagna for Cassie.

She didn't want it.

She wanted something else.

Like a cookie from Biggby's.

'Nope.' I said. 'Eat your lasagna and maybe I'd think about it.'

'I ate all of my food.' Piped up, Adara. Way to play it up.

'Okay, cookie for you.' (I think at the time, I wanted to hit home the fact that I was the one in charge, not Cassie. It may have been subconsciously to prove to myself that I had more backbone than Cassie.)

AAAHHHHHHH said Cassie

And it hasn't stopped.

She's sitting at the table complaining at the lasagna plate that its too saucy.

Ah, relief, it's 10.15 and finally she's letting me feed her the lasagna like she's a 1 year old.

-The rantings of 25 year old stay at home mom

I'm so excited!

2007-12-06T15:03:00.000-05:00

I've been working on a melody for a few months and today, I broke into something I really am freakishly excited about. I had this really great verse I wanted to use with a song, but it just didn't fit with the idea I had today and I had to put it aside reluctantly. I believe it was John Lennon who said (and I'm absolutely paraphrasing here) that sometimes when you're writing a song you have to throw out lines and sometimes whole verses, even when they are good, to get the song right. An unfortunate truth I think. Actually it helped me a lot in songwriting, and I'm not even particularly a John Lennon fanatic or anything. I mean he's good, I just haven't taken the time to listen to his songs (minus the Beatles) and I seriously want to. Just haven't. Anyways, I finished a song. I'm so excited!

These kind of days I can't wait until Josh gets home and I get to do my 'See what I did' dance.

This is the Mel I know and love.

Bizarre.

2007-12-04T14:21:00.000-05:00

So bizarre couple of days. I think when Josh leaves for work before the girls get to say good morning, it leaves us in a world of bizarre.

I found a cat this morning. However it was definitely an inside cat, so I knocked on doors and found the owner down the street. What a pretty cat. I would have adopted it in a heartbeat. It had an amazing beige long haired coat, and it's boots were brown. When it walked you could see it's 'thumb,' and it's eyes were a crystal clear blue. It loved to be loved and held.

Our cat is tearing apart our Christmas tree. It's driving me nuts. I can't wait until Christmas is over so I can take it down and not have to get after the cat every time I step out of the living room. Seriously, I've taken to walking back into the living room after I leave, just to make sure he hasn't jumped into it. He's caught onto my trick, because he now waits rather patiently for my second time around, gives me this innocent 'not doing anything to that tree' look, before he attacks. This could be why I wasn't blessed with a male child. I have a male cat to contend with instead.

It was really nice of him when he curled up on my lap for breakfast this morning though. Sometimes he's on my side, like last night when I fed him a piece of chicken while Josh was watching his football game. He went so wild over it that he started going after Josh's chicken. That was fun.

Sometimes that cat acts like such a child.

And so do I.

My cat likes to play tricks.

2007-11-28T12:52:00.000-05:00

We have bi-fold closet doors. I am constantly closing closet doors so I wouldn't be surprised if Jetta got stuck once or twice in the closet. But have no fear. He has learned to open bi-fold doors. I'm never in the closet when he does it, but I'm guessing that he pushes his paw against the inside of the door and it opens just enough for him to peek his head out. I've seen him stick his head out the door and watch me, watching him.

He likes to play games like that. The moment we are ready to go outside, he bolts for the front door so we have to coax him to go back inside.

He sneeks into the girls room at night when he knows full well that he's going to get kicked out.

He runs for the workroom door downstairs and suddenly is very quiet, hoping that I will leave him in there, so he can yowl at me to open the door and let him out.

He runs to use the litter box when I am cleaning it out. And if it is not cleaned out about every other day, he will nip and cry at you until it is done.

He will sit at the office window and yowl at the bus stop kids, because he wants to be outside with them.

He's really not that bad of a cat, minus getting on the table and attacking the christmas tree. It's like he has ADD for cats. He gets plenty of attention just from the girls alone.

He just likes to play tricks on us.

Curtains and cats

2007-11-28T12:22:00.000-05:00

I have been looking for curtains for the office and my bedroom. I'm an extremely picky person when it comes to furnishing my home. But the price also has to be right. Sometimes I break down and pay the high price for something I absolutely love, or I convince myself that it will go on sale and I will be the super sale shopper and wait until it does. Then I never go back because usually I forget that I am a super sale shopper.

I found these,

I love the sheer in the middle. I want them in black, which they have.

But I'm not impressed enough to pay the price. Not yet anyways. It might be forgotten.

And with how my window is made, I might have to cut them down to the size of my window and hem them, which I think would take away the total effect of the curtains.

My cat just got into the girls milk glasses and spilled them. Sometimes I really love my cat because he's quirky and amazing, but he drives me crazy when he gets on the table, or attacks the christmas tree.

Yeah.

My cat attacks our christmas tree and it's not even decorated. What is he going to do when I put ornaments on it?

Music

2007-11-23T12:42:00.001-05:00

So my favorite musicians right now are:

Brett Dennen: It feels like I'm Darlin', in his song 'Darling Do Not Fear'. I'm afraid of so many things, that this song reminds me that I don't have to be afraid of everything. I also like his song 'Ain't No Reason'. Very visual.
Marie Digby: Does anyone remember the remake of 'Umbrella'? My girls love this song. She also has a song called 'Spell' that I like. Soulful. What an amazing voice. Reminds me of Amy Lee's voice, who is better known as Evenescence.

I guess I'm an imagery kind of person. I envision things when they are sung. It's kind of like when you smell something that reminds you of something in the past. Sometimes when I pass the cleaning carts in hotels, the sanitary smell reminds me of my dad's hospital room when I was younger.

I've wooed my cat into sitting on my lap and not nipping. No, I didn't bribe him. He knows when I'm at the computer and he climbs into my lap, he's going to get scratched on the head. He likes being kissed on top of the head. I guess he knows that he's loved even when I get him in trouble.

Top Ten Gifts for Her.

2007-11-23T11:38:00.000-05:00

I just can't leave the girls out.

Girlie Girl- Pink. Everything is pink, frills, feathers, and dresses. Sometimes overwhelmingly so.
Executive Woman- The real power behind the power suits, pencil skirts, and heels.
The Fashionista- Gucci. Prada. The realities that make Ugly Betty so popular.
Super Mom- Who can't but love this group of ever going faithful women who take care of the children of our future. Subgroups in this category include (but are not limited to): Doctor Mom, Soccer Mom, and Mom the Tyrant.
Martha Stewart Devotee- Ahhh, it's the holidays again and we can't do it all; without the simple tips from Martha.
Female Techie- Why couldn't they have had a better name like Gadget Guru that the guys get for this category??? Makes all of the electronic friendly gals sound super dorky.
Accessories Addict- This lovely addition adores the little things in life, and takes an expensive look at your wallet when she is in need of some new jewelry or shoes. Sounds like a perfect match for the Gourmet Connoisseur. Expensive dinners with gifts. It's Christmas at every meal time.

I think that these categories can be put together. A working mom can be Super Mom and the Executive Woman. I put Josh into four different men's groups.

The men's list is so much better.

Top Ten Gifts for Him

2007-11-23T10:28:00.001-05:00

I happened to come across a list of top ten gifts for women and men. I call it the Macy's Christmas shopping list except it wasn't from Macy's at all, but it was very Macy's like in appeal. How many men really want a polo shirt for Christmas? I was thinking, maybe a Wii or plasma, but polos, end tables and cuff links? Get real, right?

The best present I saw that Josh would remotely want was a grill and it wasn't a masterful grill (you know, takes a master degree to use). Complete with every gadget known to mankind that could take up your entire kitchen if you let him grill inside.

Then I saw the golden lists. The, what kind of man are you so I can buy you presents for Christmas, list. Let me break it down for you:

Metro Man- Guys who lives in metropolitan areas such as NYC or Los Angeles. Has great insurance and doesn't know it. The kind of man that when he walks out his apartment, he slings a sport coat over his shoulder.
Gadget Guru- The techie. Grab your blackberries and IPods fellas cuz we're going cruising around town counting how many times the GPS is wrong.
Sports Junkie- The guy you can't imagine not being around some kind of field, rink or one of those big foam fingers.
Well-traveled Professional- Italy, France, England, and that's just what his suits are made out from. We know there is a manicure set hidden on this dignified gentlemen.
Devoted Dad- Shirts are made for you. Soccer moms can't compete with your enthusiasm for your sons sports team. Way to go, Dad!
Gourmet Connoisseur- Ah. The smell of lemon pepper chicken with a side of spinach, all placed on a fancy dish to impress the ladies. This guy is the guy you love to date, he wines and dines you then turns into Sports Junkie, Devoted Dad, or Best Gifts for Him under $25 after you marry him. Be warned ladies, be warned.
Mr. Fix-it- There are two kinds of Mr. Fix-its. The kind that can and the kind that really can't (but think they can).
Best Gifts for Him under $25- (I would like to take a moment to say that these gifts were not all under $25. There was a coffeemaker in here for $30.) This is for every other guy out there that simple, rednecked, poor, or the really smart guy who realized that everything was overpriced and could be gotten for a lot cheaper anywhere else. I mean really, a coffee pot for 30 bucks, although it is not unreasonable, sometimes you just want a simple machine with one purpose in mind: to make coffee.

I still don't know what to get Josh for Christmas.

Afternoon Delight - Tea, I mean

2007-11-14T16:40:00.000-05:00

So I am absolutely thrilled that my oldest daughter loves tea. She requests for a cup of tea.

Josh calls me British because I like to dunk my tea bag in hot water 3 to 5 times until my tea turns a satisfying light brown color. (Or should I say, colour???) Which, as much as he mocks my British dipping, works for him because he uses the second half of my tea bag and stains it so dark that basically you could mistake it for coffee.

Maybe I got my style from England. I figured that if I was going to try tea anywhere it might as well be in the United Kingdom. I remember standing in front of the mirror of a dresser in a bed and breakfast on my first morning in England. I was looking at the coffee decanter in distaste, and I noticed a small plate with two packages of coffee grounds, and a tea bag sitting on it displayed very nicely with two dainty tea cups that I could only imagine would be in England. I thought, contemplatively 'Hmm, never tried tea before,' as I found myself dunking my tea bag in hot water to a very light, could have been mistaken for the last leftover coffee rinse, kind of tea color. Despite the too light of flavor for my taste I found that I really liked it and perfected my dunking skills while I was in the UK. Now it's really more of a religion. I think I drink tea more often than I pray. Bow to the hot water and kiss the tea bag.

Lately I've grown quite attached to Dragon Eye Oolong Tea. And I only tried it because of it's name. This year, I also had to start drinking decaf after years of not having a problem. You know, because of the strange thing called, youth. It naturally follows my stretch marks, and more recent face lines that I found just this week. I must smile too much. Oh well, I wasn't a porcelain doll anyways.

And truth be told, I give Laurel decaf. I can't stand the thought of giving her caffeinated tea before bed, despite the fact that her body probably could sleep just as well if I did. She'll thank me in 20 years (when she gets face lines) that I was nice enough to introduce her to the magical world of tea.

My cat has mad jumping skills

2007-11-12T12:56:00.000-05:00

Jetta can jump up 3 feet in the air to get up on the counter, where he knows he doesn't belong. I thought that counter was safe since there were no chairs or any ledges he could leap from, but no. Nothing is safe anymore. Now that I think about it I guess he's been practicing, since our bed is irregularily high off the ground. It was originally a waterbed frame, which are naturally higher off the ground with storage underneath. We put a mattress on top of it and wa-la super queen sized bed without sea sickness.

We don't let him sleep in our bed at night. He's become really possessive during the day when he naps on our bed. Gives me dirty looks like I shouldn't be coming into the room at all.

He's working on trying to open doors too. He knows you can pop open a door that isn't properly shut all the way by sliding his paw underneath the door.

He's an eternal 3 year old.

Today I am known as Mom the Tyrant.

2007-11-07T13:58:00.000-05:00

Tid-bit of the day that's totally unrelated: I hate when people I am close to, don't get excited with me about the happy things that happen in my life. That tears me down.

I flipped off the deep end when my youngest produced numero dos in her underwear. She has developed a habit of fighting me whenever I have to clean her messes. While I was struggling to clean it up she managed to have wiped it all over my clothes. Now that's disgusting. I can handle being thrown up on, used as a Kleenex, food landing in my hair, but when they start smearing crap on me, I get mad. Very mad.

Like I said. I flipped. Today, I thought, was going to be different. I was in the clear to gain back Mel's confidence and identity. I was ready to be me again. Not a facet of me, just me. I even started rummaging through my closet and tried on clothes for my sister's wedding, (meaning: I tried on something other than a t-shirt). I only do that when I feel confident. Imagine my anger after the whole ordeal was done as I thought, 'Just as I start to gain Mel back, I'm reduced to the slavery of being a mom. Lowest of all lows.' I have no confidence in myself. I don't have any faith in the fact that I can do anything at all!!!

Where did Mel go?

I imagine down the toilet with all the other crap I just cleaned up.

And I don't want to hear about all the reasons as to why being a mom is such a blessing. Because today? It sucks. Royally.

ahh. Now I feel better. I think because I just admitted to myself that being a mom can really suck sometimes. And not being Mel really sucks too.

Only one dirty deed left:

I just have to reach into the toilet and pull myself back out.

Wall

2007-11-05T09:23:00.000-05:00

So my youngest daughter just tripped and whacked her head on an wall. Of course I saw in slow motion the whoa, and the thwack, so I scooped her up to cradle her in my arms. She pointed to her head so I knew where to kiss, and then pointed at the offending wall. Like usual, I yell at the wall because she thinks it's halirious and then make the wall apologize in a very convincing wall-like voice.

Today, before going on her merry way, she decided to hug the wall and tell it that it was a nice wall. She then told me that the wall said thank you, and proceeded on babbling about the wall being nice.

Alright.

Jetta thinks he's the Mighty Hunter, and dust bunnies are his prey.

2007-10-30T09:01:00.000-04:00

Our cat thinks he's the might hunter.

He attacks ankles and Mickey Mouse slippers like he were a tiger in the African safari.

He preys on innocent bugs. He bats them around until they are unsure which direction to go and then eats them. Very circle of life-ish.

He may think he is a mighty hunter but he exhibits many dog like qualities as well.

For example, he can't ever seem to find snacks we give him, even when they are right in front of his face.

Or the fact that he drinks out of the toilet. Maybe that's the survival skills of a true hunter. To always know where to find the water hole.

I'm just not sure.

2007-10-29T16:48:00.000-04:00

I get upset over the dumbest things.

Like just now my neighbor across the street knocked on my door to ask me if I knew about the red truck across the street.

I politely let him fumble out words to get across the fact that he wanted me to move the truck.

See the thing is, Josh was suppose to move that truck into the driveway, but never did. So I was waiting out to see how long it was going to take him to move it.

Our neighbor looks me in the eye and states. "Did you know there is a city ordinance on parking on the street overnight?"
"Really?" I said wide-eyed.
"Oh yes!" he continues,"And my wife keeps complaining each time she looks out the window and sees it..."

Of course I had to laugh. That's when the cat ran out our front door for freedom, or rather he wanted to hide under our van and catch a few sunbeams. He likes to flop on the ground and soak up the rays.

Anyways after I caught the cat, which took me all of a minute, I looked up at him and said. "Well, in the name of marital bliss, I will definately move that truck." He laughed and walked back across the street.

I moved the truck. I guess if I had to choose who's marital bliss I had to save today, it was going to be my neighbor across the street that I didn't know.

That's when I got upset. Our neighbor wasn't mean to me, and overall it was a pleasant transaction, I think I was more upset that I got in trouble for Josh's mistake. Then I started to second guess myself, because I could have moved the truck, but I was being stubborn as usual and trying to make a point. You know, the 'why is it that you don't do things when I ask like a naggy wife,' point. Because this all could have been avoided.

That's when I called Josh and chewed him out. I was now mad that I got in trouble for his problem. Then I became ten times more upset now that I yelled at Josh, out of guilt that I probably made Josh feel bad. And when I told Josh, I made it sound like our neighbor was out of line. But he wasn't. I was just mad at that point.

All this just so I could prove a point.

So stupid.

St Matthews Part 2

2007-09-17T10:28:00.000-04:00

I've gotten sacred salt quoting 2 Kings 2:19-22, a purple ribbon and a real hankerchief this time.

I have them hanging on my board to remind me why I don't want a meaningless religion.

Jetta?

2007-09-17T10:19:00.000-04:00

We got a cat about 2 months ago and Laurel named it Jetta after the girl in Clifford the big red dog.

However we went to the vet today and she trimmed Jetta's nails and found in fact that Jetta is not a girl at all. Just a slowly maturing male cat.

I'm voting for the name change to be Jet Li.

I have a feeling however that 'he' will remain Jetta.

2007-09-04T11:38:00.000-04:00

Hi. How are you?

It's time for change. I can feel it. School's starting, fall is on it's way, it's just in the air.

We've been waiting for a while to get our windows done and I thought today was the day. Unfortunately, my mother informed me that today was not September 5th, and sure enough on my calendar, my windows are to be done on Wednesday the 5th. Tomarrow. Suddenly I have all this free time today to do something really great!

Like picking out plates for Jeff's birthday. Or go resale shopping. Or, even better, go out for an amazing coffee at Beaners.

Or I could save some money and just stay home and catch up on Smallville episodes. I like Lex Luthor in this series. Hands down, way better than Kevin Spacey as Lex. And as an extra bonus, I usually fold laundry while watching episodes.

And I probably could take the time and take out all the window blind holders on the insides of the window.

Sounds like I'm going to be doing something a bit more constructive, inexpensive (and more boring) today.

Sue-ducku

2007-08-26T15:31:00.000-04:00

Funny.

Salesman tactics.

2007-08-24T09:49:00.000-04:00

I had a door to door salesman try to convince me he was fluent in German, French, Hindu and Detroit ghetto.

Kindergarten Graduation

2007-06-07T12:55:00.000-04:00

I stink at parenting. More specifically I stink as the parent who goes on field trips. The extremely weird and ironic thing is that Laurel loves that I go.

Or maybe I just hate the zoo. Now that I think about it, all of the field trips I've been on are at nature trails or places where animals are confined to one area. I don't like seeing animals stuck in captivity for our viewing pleasure. It really bothers me.

And I'm not a hard-core animal advocate or even an environmentalist in the slightest. I like to take care of our earth, but I am horribly American in my efforts. It has to be convenient. I'm willing to drive if it's in an area I am in most often.

Lately I've been fighting with what my priorities are as a parent. I put Laurel into T-Ball this year and I am looking into a dance class for Dar. I want to give opportunities to my girls that play on their strengths. So they don't look back and regret the fact that mom was too blind to see what they were interested in. But there is the monetary issue that plays a key part in my decisions. I really don't like to put a price on my girls learning.

And partly I feel like I don't have any skills that benefit me or anyone else. When I was fairly young my mom bought me a pair of ballet slippers because I told her I wanted to be a dancer. I'm not sure if she signed me up for classes or if she couldn't afford them but I've always felt like that it was a huge loss because I didn't even get a chance to try ballet. Thinking back on it, I'm not sure if I would have been any good at it, considering how klutzy I am, and really, I don't have the personality for it as I am not a perfectionist in that sense. My body just doesn't move simultaneously with other people. Graceful is not one word to use to describe me.

I felt like a klutzy ballerina today at the zoo today. I did not move simultaneously with other people. In fact we moved opposite of other people. The ‘group’ moved from the front of the park towards the back and rushed back to the meeting place which was in front. I however figured if we went straight for the back and made our way towards the front, that it would be more efficient. We got to see everything we wanted to see. Except for the other people because they were still in the front of the park.

Oh well. The zoo doesn’t hold those kinds of animals. Something about human rights…

Star Wars

2007-05-17T09:34:00.000-04:00

My girls really like Star Wars. We have a Lego Star Wars game that they love to play, so Josh and I decided to watch the original trilogy which made our house explode with Star Wars terminology. There is always one Princess Leia and usually a Luke running around. Cassie will run to get her light saber to fight monsters and pose and fight like boys do at that age. Cassie calls Darth Vader, Ubadaber, and will teach you to say it just like she does.

Josh is usually Ubadaber. He calls Cassie, Ubadaughter. Somehow, it fits.

Right.

2007-04-27T21:28:00.000-04:00

It never ceases to amaze me how we are made into the people we are. How one thing or one person can shape our entire lives, and lead us into a whole new direction that no one would have thought possible.

I can think of many instances of which I could have taken a different path and turned out as someone totally different.

It's interesting to me how everything works so we can be in a place to serve other people whole-heartedly.

It took me a while to realize that just as much as I could never live to be like my mom, she could never live to be like me. If my mom wasn't the way that she is, then I wouldn't be who I am. Just as her parents before her, and her grandparents before that and so on and so forth. All things come together for a purpose and although we never know what that purpose is, we can trust that it's the right one. It's always the right one. Bad times don't happen because they are wrong, (they may be evil and unfair, but it doesn't make the situation wrong) they happen so we can step up and keep fighting for what is right. Somehow we just keep trying to do what's right.

God doesn't give us anything that we can't handle.

The textbook answer

2007-04-24T16:27:00.000-04:00

Right now I'm waiting for Josh to get home so I can go up to the hospital and sweet talk the nurses to treat my mom right. I think the last nurse I saw last night was getting pretty annoyed with me, but she kept forgetting to do things, so I would remind her. Poor woman. She had a lot on her mind, I'm sure.

I'm really asking for prayer, for not just our family but especially for my mom.

We actually went to church last weekend. Josh wants to join in counseling engaged couples for marriage. We had a really awesome couple for our marriage prep and I want to turn around and be able to give that to someone else. We'll see. There is an application process; which we have to apply and interview before we can counsel other people. Who knows. I shouldn't be afraid, but I am. I'm afraid that the people who see my application are going to reject me because of my age or the fact that we haven't been going to church for a few months like that makes me a weak christian or something. I don't want to be going for the wrong reasons. I guess it's their problem if they want to judge me and if I'm not suppose to be involved there then I won't be.

So says the textbook answer.

You'd think that at 24 years old, married, and with 3 kids; that I would feel more like an adult. Honestly, I feel more like a kid each day, as I discover how big this world really is and how minuscule I am in it. I keep realizing how much that I just don't know and could never possibly understand. As if I lost control as a teenager when thought I had the world wrapped around my fingers and had it all figured out.

I think I just don't like being at the mercy of people who are older than me. I have to hope they have have the grace to understand my naivete, and have no way to protect myself from it.

St. Matthews

2007-04-17T20:13:00.000-04:00

So I wrote these people back and I've gotten a worthless book, a purple ribbon to put under my pillow, and two cents.

Yes. Two pennies. I put them in our change jar.

Oh and more forbidden prophesies!

Josh wants the free prayer coin that you have to send in for.

Hey. What do I know about God's kingdom anyways. How can a religion about God who is all about what's right; feel so wrong???

Bombarded

2007-04-17T19:45:00.000-04:00

I've really been having a tough week. Josh has said that it feels like it's been a week long each day. Yeah, that's exactly how I feel.

Keep (or please put) our family in your prayers, especially this week coming up.

I've always hated drama. I don't like conflict. I used to think that I liked to fight and argue, even though I knew I sucked at it (and thought that if I practiced enough that I'd get better at it). I just liked the fact that I got everything out in my fights in my head, and when it came to the real thing, I realized I didn't get anything out at all. Arguments are like that.

What it comes down to is that I really don't want to hurt anyone with whatever words I'm thinking of spitting out.

That's not why I've been having a tough week. Not really. We've just been bombarded with a lot of really sucky stuff. I don't even like the word sucky and I've used two forms of it in this post alone.

I can't help but think of how many people re-read the post to find all the times I used the word. Actually, it amuses me.

Done

2007-04-09T10:52:00.000-04:00

Sometimes life tosses up a deck of cards and says, now it's time to play 52 pick-up.

We haven't been going to church for a quite a while now. I can't quite pin the reason why exactly, I think I'm just done with religion. That's not to say I'm done with God, and I don't care if you throw into my face that God asks us to be in community with other believers. I could be absolutely wrong about this right now. But I'm just not accepting the fact that we went to church and tried to connect with people and came out worse than when we went in. A church will never be perfect since it is lined with imperfect people. It just seems like the wrong reason to be going to church. I mean you go to learn about God, but you also go to connect with other people who believe like you do. I think I was just looking for one person just to sit down with for coffee every once in a while and just be comforted with the fact that you believe the same ideas. Someone else to bounce ideas off of and put your head back on your shoulders again. I'm currently getting more of a sense of community from a pair of Jehovah's Witnesses that keep stopping by my door.

I think put too much faith into people. I keep hoping that there just might be someone else out there who wants to do the right thing all the time, no matter what. It feels like everyone has a motive. Me included.

We went to this Ben Folds concert last week and it was really cool. I wish he wouldn't feel the need to swear all the time but everybody has their thing, I guess. Ever since then I've been listening to a few of his songs like they were a religion or something. Sorry Mr. Ben Folds, but I'm not going to be head priestess of the Foldites.

I guess I just like the free style he has. Something I wish I could get a hold of. Seems like I can't let go and just be free. Always captive to something. I'm sure he is captive to something else.

Isn't that the way it is with human beings?

I'm fervently religious when things come crashing down around my ears, but when it comes to the calms in my life God is a trinket on a charm bracelet. How's that for honesty? I hate feeling like I'm just like an Israelite in the desert for 40 years. Human characteristics don't change over thousands upon thousands of years. I'm just as likely to turn my back on God when there is nothing better to do, but when something happens, I'm first to start praying. The story's the same, only the time and place is different.

And at this point in my life, I still believe in God and His Word. I still believe that things happen for a reason and that He knows what's going on. I trust in that. That's not my ultimate truth or anything, but everything else right now just seems to be up for interpretation.

Georgia

2007-03-15T15:03:00.000-04:00

So I decided on a whim that I was driving with the girls for a weekend in Georgia. I have some relatives there that I haven't seen since I got married, and I knew they would be excited to see the girls. And they were.

I also found out a lot about my dad's side of the family and got some photos of him when he was younger that I value very much. I don't have much of my dad's things, so I really enjoy the things that I have that were once his.

Plus I got to soak in the Georgia weather, and come back to an equally beautiful day here in Michigan. That was awesome.

The girls were fun traveling companions, although I was worn out when I got back. They are a lot of work, but those amazing times when the wonder and awe of a different world reaches their eyes. Priceless. Laurel was amazed with the mountains, we first encountered the mountains at night, so I told her that the rock face on either side was just a small part of the mountain, she couldn't comprehend how huge they really are until we saw them on the way back. Then the amazement really set in.

We went through Chattanooga at night time, and if you ever go, go on I-24 from the North to the South. It goes around Chattanooga and night seems so black, until it opens up suddenly to the twinkling lights of the city, cascading up the mountainside. It is truly amazing to see the city lights and know just how many people are living in one area. I could imagine the horror that people felt in ancient times when invading armies of thousands upon thousands start to crawl down the mountain each with a torch in their hand. It was an awestruck kind of a moment.

The girls and I had an impromptu picnic on the way back through Kentucky. Cassie was having a meltdown, and it was about time to stop anyways. I had packed food for the trip, so we wouldn't have to stop fast food style. So I grabbed out the plates and cups and we sat on the lawn of a hotel part way up the mountainside. The girls had a lot of fun and it seemed to be perfect timing; since we made really good time after that.

So now I'm planning a trip with my mom for a weekend, not sure where or when yet.

Just browsing

2007-03-05T12:11:00.000-05:00

The scientific view of God: (by www.doesgodexist.org)

The purpose of this brief study is to offer a logical, practical, pragmatic proof of the existence of God from a purely scientific perspective. To do this, we are assuming that we exist, that there is reality, and that the matter of which we are made is real. If you do not believe that you exist, you have bigger problems than this study will entail and you will have to look elsewhere.

How very appropriate.

Chain mail for God.

2007-03-05T09:22:00.000-05:00

We as humans are so alike in so many ways; we are all trying to survive to some end. All of us have some sort of desperation, an idea we cling to, just to make it through. For some its work, others family, religion, music, books, food, even death, there’s a spark of an idea in everyone. A desperation. And on that note, there are products and materials in this world for every desperation, to appeal to each person and their cravings or desires.

So yesterday I received a letter in the mail to appeal to the desperation of life and financial need.

Another credit card offer anyone?

Imagine my confusion as I pull out a beige and pink piece of paper made to look like it was embroidered. Embroidered stationary? I thought. Then I found as I unfolded several pictures of Anglo-Saxon Jesus, that it was meant to be a prayer handkerchief, which you were to place your name and a name of someone you want to pray for on the handkerchief and send it back to the church it originated. Which I'm all for people praying for me.

What I’m not for as I read on, was the testimonials of people, like O.C. and Anonymous, who sent it back and received large amounts of financial blessings, all attributed to this pink hanky. What would make me want to send it back and add yet another name to their list? The money! Forget prayer. Oh, I’m glad we have that cleared up.

Money: the Deity of Desperation.

As if that weren’t good enough. Enclosed is the sealed magic prophesies that you aren't suppose to open until you send off the handkerchief back to the church, within days of receiving the letter, that is specifically written for you.

I confess, I can’t help but open forbidden prophesies.

I just can’t imagine a church believing, trying to get people to believe in this idea of magic and charm of what seems like a jaded Christianity to me. People see this kind of letter and think, what are those stupid Christians doing this time, as if we are all the same? How far from Christ do we have to get to get people to believe in Him? Does this church not believe that the Bible is full of prophecy? It’s completely and fully open to everyone, not hidden just for Christians to read! How many Christians do YOU see hiding in corners and reading their "Magic" bibles? The point is it’s not magic, it doesn’t change, doesn’t need to be printed on pink embroidered handkerchiefs.

I just feel this plays on human desperation and that actually makes me pretty angry. Makes me almost want to drive out to Oklahoma or wherever they sent this from to tell them how a chain letter full of prophecies isn't really the way to go.

I'm thinking about sending it back. Free postage.

Quarantined.

2007-02-08T09:25:00.000-05:00

Oliver is now on our wall of fame. He's 2ft 5in. Only a couple inches shorter than Cassie.

Last night we made an unplanned trip to the doctor's office, which happens to be 20 miles away. Josh called in to schedule an appointment for Laurel, since she wasn't feeling better after two days of staying home, and I don't want to send her to school and infect other kids. Other parents might do it, but I don't. Anyways, we needed to get a doctor's note to keep her out of school until she got better, and the doctor's office happened to have an opening at 730 last night. So at 720, out the door we went, and arrived at 740 (Big surprise since 20 miles is usually 20 minutes).

So we're still quarantined until this weekend (minus Oliver, who had it 2 weeks ago). It looks like the tidal wave is just about over though, after 2 weeks of the rounds at the Pung house. It didn't hit us the way it usually does, we are usually down for 2 to 3 days, and then it's over. Not two weeks. Oh well. We're through the worst of it.

Jinx

2007-02-05T22:14:00.000-05:00

I cursed Laurel. She is really sick, perhaps worse than the rest of us. Or maybe it's because we are feeling so much better that she just looks 10 times worse.

Actually what gave me the tip was the fact that she wasn't her usually smiley self today and sat on the couch. Not good. She woke up tonight and looked absolutely awful.

Honest! I didn't wish she would get sick! I was just annoyed that all of us were sick and she was still bouncing around like she was Tigger or something. It's like when you're really grouchy (or haven't had your morning cup of coffee yet) and this amazingly happy person walks in the room. She was just that bubbly.

I have to admit though. I've raised some really happy kids.

Tall

2007-02-05T11:16:00.000-05:00

I finally measured how tall the girls are.

Laurel is 3ft 7in
Adara is 3ft 5 1/2in
Cassie is 3ft 1in

I looked at Dar and Laurel today and realized, they are really close to the same height. I decided I better record it before they get any bigger.

I'm not good at these things.

I'm good at teaching them to be monkeys or how to hold a pencil right. I'm not good at memoriblia items or holidays.

Take what you can get.

You deserve it.

2007-02-05T09:19:00.000-05:00

It always surprises me how I have this standard to uphold, and someone else will have a different standard, much higher than mine. I always thought that my standards were pretty hard to reach because they are usually set pretty high, but there are times when someone knocks me off my pedestal and revamps my way of thinking.

For example, if I start thinking it's time for us to build a deck onto our house, and someone else has already drawn up the plans and has built it two times the size I would have gone with.

I'm not sure whether to be pleased or annoyed. I'm pleased because someone took the time and effort to build something way better than I could have hoped for. But I'm annoyed because in my line of thought, bigger is not always better, and there probably is a reason I would of built my deck that size and shape to accommodate my family and our lifestyle. I would have left the whole backyard intact, whereas the other person took up half my yard with wooden posts and planks, that I'd liked to have left for the girls to play in. But then I toy with the idea that maybe for some fate like reason I was meant to let someone give me something that could be better, and they feel good each and every time they look at it saying, "I helped built that deck."

I'm not building a deck here people. Not yet anyways, maybe next summer.

I don't really struggle with accepting people's gifts, usually I'm in the process of accepting gifts and something always comes up that the people giving the gift either need it more than I do or someone else needs that same gift so I end up touching it for 2 seconds before I pass it on to someone else. Isn't that called re-gifting?

No, I think the point is that I think I deserve something and then I remind myself, no I really don't "deserve" anything. Why is it that we demand our rights and think, "Finally! I can use the break in my income taxes to buy something for me!" When we've just spent ourselves into debt a week ago saying the same exact thing for a bonus we received from our jobs. Don't get me wrong. I like to spend money on things I will never take into the afterlife with me. But I think our perspective is a little screwed up when we are buying prestige and class trying to impress someone with how much we can put ourselves farther into debt. Yes, the debt owed to buy back your life is very impressive!!!

My point is, although I get a certain thrill when we cut anything out of our budget that we don't need, what makes us think that we deserve anything we keep? Why do we deserve the jobs we work at? Sweat and blood right? Maybe you got lucky that the only resume out of the pile that got picked was yours. But who's to say you aren't going to lose your job tomorrow. Are you going to be pounding at the door yelling, "I was unfairly treated!" What makes you think you "deserved" that job?

I guess it all comes down to whos standards you really live by. I mean I may think that the deck I would build would be right for my family, but maybe the bigger deck is the better option and I don't know it yet. Maybe gifts I receive that I turn right around and give to someone else will be used for better things than I would have used them for. Maybe I'm just the middleman. Maybe that's why I don't think I deserve anything, because I know that things can change in a heartbeat, that anything I think I deserve, can be ripped right out beneath me. Either I'm blind and afraid to believe I deserve anything or maybe my standards are based on the fact I believe God will put me where He needs me to be and it will be right. That's not deserving anything, that's just being where I'm planted to be. Knowing that whatever I could possibly need, some other middleman will pass it to me.

I wasted too many years on pity parties over what I thought I deserved.

Cassie girl.

2007-02-04T08:30:00.000-05:00

Thought this was cute.

She's really getting too big. I found a picture that I thought was Cassie but it turned out to be Laurel when she was 3. I didn't realize how much Cassie looks like Laurel until that moment.

Randomology

2007-02-04T08:13:00.000-05:00

We have been mowed over this past week and a half.

Someone or several someones in our house have been sick for the last ten days, except Laurel, who has an immune system like steel, she finally got a little stuffy last night and still managed to wake up beautiful and sick-free. I should be so happy for her.

And we're still fighting. I have this theory that with all the time Josh and I have been getting up for whichever girl is sick for the past week and then some that we just aren't getting the needed rest we should be to be healthy again. And I didn't need a bachelors degree for that. Deduced it on my own. I'm some kind of Einstein.

It just stinks.

Cassie just walked in here, demanded juice, and called me Melame.

It was cute.

Runny nose and all.

Babies

2007-01-11T14:52:00.000-05:00

He wasn't saving food for later, he was saving the entire utensil for later.

He then popped the fork right out of his shirt and promptly started chewing it.

I know. This picture looks like I'm holding him at fork-point. Honestly though, he was just complaining because I was taking his picture and would of rather been chewing on the camera.

Missed.

2007-01-11T14:29:00.001-05:00

Yes. I figured out why Laurel missed the blue house. She was afraid that the bus would "miss" the house and she would never get home. Now that we have that cleared up...

She didn't really miss me at all, she was just afraid of being missed.

Bus

2007-01-09T13:43:00.000-05:00

Laurel ran off the bus today and said, "Mom, I missed you! I missed you and the blue house!" (Which is what my girls call our new house.) She is such a homebody.

Laurel

2007-01-08T10:08:00.000-05:00

Today is Laurel's first day of school at her new school. She's been out of school for a month now, we pulled her out early because she wasn't doing well at Riley. We've been really psyching her for school, just these last weeks, she was finally beginning to get excited about going to school again. I'm just glad she isn't dreading it anymore.

When I took her in, I started to get really excited too. They have a lot of programs and different things that Riley just did not have. And the programs that Riley had, Colt is taking a step farther. For example, RIF (Reading is fundamental), it's a program where kids get to look at new books and the focus is that reading is fun. At Riley they got to pick a book out and send the tab home, for the parents to buy. At Colt, the PTA financed RIF so that the kids can each take home 3 books for free!!!! How is that not awesome??? And Laurel's teacher is amazing! She excited about the kids and interacts with them constantly, helps them out. It's just amazing. I can't believe what a difference. This school is going to be much better for Laurel.

I'm so excited for her!!!

Weird

2007-01-05T14:25:00.000-05:00

The most weird thing happened to me today. I'm not even sure weird is the right word for it, it's was astounding, and just overall amazing.

I usually make my way through life not making eye contact or talking with anyone besides my own kids. I think it's just I don't have the confidence. I'm not sure I try anymore.

I tend to go to the grocery store and pretty much apologize my way through it. Usually one of my girls are running into someone or gets into someones way, so I am constantly saying that I'm sorry. But I actually see people then, I look them in the face and for what little time I have, I try to be as gracious as I can be. Some people are super grouchy, others, it makes them smile that 3 little girls are following around their mom like ducklings. That may be the only smile they have that day.

A guy today said hi to me, and usually I just say hi back and keep on going, but today I said, Hi, how are you?

He wasn't pretty. In fact although his hair was freshly cut and clothes were clean, he walked limply with a walker and his face was severely scarred. Slowly and stuttering, it was hard to hear and understand him, but his story poured out of him that 23 year ago, he went out in the street on his bike, and got hit by a car.

The words that keep haunting me is when he told me, "Never give up." Like my own personal message. "I haven't given up," he says and that was very clear.

I keep thinking about Jesus and the lame beggar, or the blind man. Both outcasts of society, overjoyed when Jesus healed their needs; unlike them this man didn't let his outward appearance deter his desire to talk to people and tell them about Jesus or his willingness to never give up. He was living proof that Jesus doesn't have to be alive to be evident in our lives, to have a desire to keep on keeping on, no matter what is handed on our plates.

Last night I went out with my sister-in-laws, and the waitress came to drop off the bill, she fumbled around in her pocket and finally started unloading it. Embarrassed she pulled out a Gideon Bible, and said, "Yeah I got handed this today, it's just been one of those days. I guess someone thought I needed to get me some religion."

I keep thinking, what could I have possibly said? It just seems that God placed her in my hands for a reason, just like He placed the man at the store.

I don't even think I'm trying to understand the why, I'm trying to understand the what do I need to do next. I'm lost here. It just feels like someone is barging in and throwing people into my lap when all I want is just to make it to the end. And I know I have a small life, I don't deny it. All I can handle is taking care of my girls. These little encounters throw me off. I have to step back and think before I act as I shake off the impact.

I don't know what to think right now.

It's not my birthday.

2006-12-30T19:38:00.000-05:00

Wow.

So much has been happening that I can't think of where to start.

So let's start with today.

Today was suppose to be an immensely productive day. My in-laws came over to help Josh with a few things around the house. We dropped off the girls at my mothers house to spend the night, and were planning on a nice relaxing day after we had worked. However. Today just did not start out right. It was one of those days were everything started a new problem. I woke up this morning to a sink that wouldn't drain, so with all my power and might I tried a few things to get it to do, well, something besides just stand there. And the water didn't budge.

So I left it.

After we dropped off the girls and gave the sink some time to think about draining, we came back home to fix it's problems. After a bit of pulling and pushing, water still standing in the sink and backing-up into my dishwasher, my father-in-law decided it was time to take a look downstairs. He found an entire section of basement soaked in water. After the area was cleared, he took a look at the pipes, which I returned back upstairs, where my mother-in-law, my sister-in-law and I stood by the sink, talking and waiting for my father-in-law to tell us what he needed next. Instead there was a yelp, then the sink gurgled and drained, all in the matter of seconds.

"Why is the sink draining?" I asked and then realized that the yelp may lead to an answer.

There stood my father-in-law, drenched in whatever had been left in the sink for eons, and a smell arose so vicious that it awoke any senses that may have been sleeping. Josh ran back and forth with buckets and I ran for towels, as the pipes were still leaking this grey sludge, with rocks and onion peels left for us to contemplate what kind of people lived in our house before us.

It didn't stop there, my father in law had brought what he called "The Snake" which was a cord that he fished down the line about 2 feet or so, dragged back whatever had been in the pipe and then going in another 2 feet, trying to reach and pull clear a clog. He went in 20 feet before calling it quits. We hauled out at least 5 gallons of grey sludge.

And at this very moment, we still don't have a working kitchen sink. However, our bathroom and laundry facilities are fully functional, since they are at the opposite end of the house.

And I'm not at the least bit upset. In fact, I was more upset over the fact that I pinched myself in the closet door this morning than I was over the cascading waterfall of grey sludge on my basement floor.

I think God was preparing me, you know, the 'pinch to grow an inch' that you get each birthday as a kid.

No.

It's not my birthday.

House

2006-12-07T02:18:00.000-05:00

I can't believe it's here. The morning we sign our lives away on a house. It seems like it was never going to to be a possiblity again and yet, God swept us away and blessed us outragiously. How does He do that???

Keep us in your prayers, as the next few days of moving will be stressful. I've gotten everything I can packed. Yesterday I hit a point in the day where I was just wandering around the house looking for something else I could pack like I was obsessed or something. It took me a good half an hour of wandering to finally say, Yup, I'm done, and sit down to a (now cold) cup of tea.

Oliver is getting pretty sick of me packing. He crawling now and follows me around the house. He gets so angry when he finds me near a box, that he turns over on his back, yowls and starts kicking the box full force with both feet as if to say, "Hey! You're paying more attention to that inadimate object than me!" Kick, Kick, Kick, Kick, I hear his feet as they turn in rapid spinning circles. So I pick him up and twirl around with him, which then he smiles and turns back into the happy baby he once was, before he saw me and the box within 2 inches of each other. Eventually, I return him to the living room to play and it starts all over again.

I wonder how he's going to react to unpacking.

Moving

2006-11-28T15:49:00.000-05:00

Okay, I have a few minutes to post. I can't say I've been entirely busy with packing up to move, since I have maybe 15 boxes packed. It's hard to pack up a house when your stuff is still intertwined with other peoples stuff. You tend to forget who's is what. Well, that and you're still living there. So dishes are a no, and any bathroom necessities are a no... I'm so used to packing up in one week or less and moving. This is a little backwards to me.

We have a few genius touches this time though. My mother-in-law painted each girl a box so they can pack and find their personal stuff. We actually have a truck thanks to my brother. And I have a couple days to clean and paint BEFORE we move in, which is a novelty.

I'm curious where this is leading us because it's all happening so fast. It seems like there is something bigger in store for us, and I'm both excited and nervous to face it head-on.

Merge: Communion

2006-11-13T08:41:00.000-05:00

Last night Josh and I went to the Merge meeting at Riv. The theme for this year's events is communion, so this time, it was decided that we would actually take communion. The people were sat down at a table of six or eight, and were given time to talk with one another. Then we were asked to talk about the idea of communion and what it means, then the table would pray together before they broke the bread. Afterwards they were given time to talk with people. I was taking pictures at the time, so I could hear the conversations and the prayers throughout the room. These are a few that struck me.

I saw a 20something male tell about his life and then admit, "It's all that I have."

I ended up talking to one woman who doesn't attend Riv, and she asked me about how Riv got started. Eventually it led into her life story. She was excited at the boldness of Riv and was even more excited about how she could help.

Another woman was excited to lead a small group but couldn't lead it in her own home.

I talked to a man who when it came time to pray, led in a bold prayer that left the table silent and awestruck. "I don't remember exactly what I prayed but when I said Amen and lifted up my head, one woman looked at me and said, 'Awesome.' That opened up the table for honest and real discussion."

Another woman said when I asked her about the whole event, "It's needed. The communion, the sense of community, people just need that."

I can't say for sure lives were changed or that people even left with the right idea in mind, but I did see several people exchange phone numbers, email addresses and encouraged several to fill out surveys. It's a start. People were curious and excited to know what Merge was doing next. And that is exciting.

This said from simply an observer.

Halloween

2006-11-09T09:25:00.000-05:00

Laurel was Wendy from Peter Pan.

Dar was Princess Dora. She looks good with black hair.

Cassie was Belle from Beauty and the Beast.

Last year Laurel went as Belle and Dar was all disappointed because she wasn't a pretty princess too, so this year we made sure that Cassie wasn't left out of the prettiness. She was so thrilled to be Belle. That costume has seen several Halloweens in the past few years.

This year was the first year in downtown St. Johns where they had trick or treating open at several businesses for the little kids, who probably won't make it for the actual trick or treating later that night. I had no idea how many kids under 9 years old lived in St. Johns. There was so many kids, it was hard to find parents.

Dar looks like her Aunt Sam in this picture, it's the black hair I think. I never thought Dar looked like a Pung, but this seems to prove it.

Grandma's cup

2006-11-09T09:03:00.000-05:00

So I sat down to my morning coffee, and the cup I usually use was dirty, so I grabbed another mug, not a big deal.

Not realizing that it is a big deal to Cassie who said...

"Mom that's Grandma's cup."

"Yes, it's Grandma's but I'm using it today."

After several minutes of trying to convince me that it's Grandma's and that I should use another mug, she turns to Josh and says.

"Daddy, look at Mommy. Mommy is using Grandma's cup."

Obviously I did something wrong.

Memorization and repetition matters.

2006-10-23T10:57:00.000-04:00

I can't believe how fast time is flying by, next week is Halloween. I pretty much have the family cd set this Christmas, I need to record it and put it together, but the basic idea is there. I'm excited about it, I'm going to be putting 4 or 5 of my songs on it, and a few things from the girls and Josh. It was a lot of fun to put together last year, makes me much more excited about the Christmas season.

I still haven't put my applications in, and honestly, I'm waiting until we move, (which will be in the next 6 months) when things settle down. I really don't want to start a new job and be moving at the same time. It'll be better for my family. And maybe something will show up before then. Who knows what the future brings.

I finally downloaded iTunes, and have been listening to different podcasts. I tend to learn by repetition, so I end up listening to the same podcast usually 2 to 3 times, before I can grasp the big picture. Oh, I'm fine with details, I'm just too busy thinking about those little details to get a hold of something bigger. I love the fact that our church records their messages so I can listen to them again, and take the time to fully understand them.

In fact, Laurel has been memorizing verses for church, so yesterday I asked her to repeat them to my brother and mom. She remembered all of them word for word and most of the time remembered the references. Then my brother and I went through our heads all the verses we had learned from Awana and DCC, in general. It was quite amazing what we had stored up in our minds, and what we could recall 12-16 years later. I thought I had forgotten most of that stuff.

I guess memorization and repetition really does matter.

The Square went "Pft."

2006-10-22T15:00:00.000-04:00

We were talking to a couple of our friends, who came over to visit us last week. The girls were playing like usual, they'd run in and out, just doing their own thing. Then Dar comes running in and says, "Mom! Mom! I was in there and the square went 'pft!'" in a rather urgent voice as she threw up her hands to signify the urgency of the sound.

Curious, I walked down to see what square she was talking about, if she was talking about a square at all. I walked into the girl's room and there sat a drawer (rectangular, by the way) in the middle of the floor that had fallen out of it's dresser.

"Yes Dar, I guess the square did go 'pft.'"

Winter in October

2006-10-12T11:56:00.000-04:00

How did all you Michiganders like the first snowfall of winter?

My girls loved it. First I went outside to pick up all the toys and Josh came out in his sandals, so we had a snowball fight.

The girls decided that looked fun, so they had one as well.

It's starting to melt away now, I'm glad the girls got to play outside when they did. No one was ready for winter in October, anyways.

Cornelius

2006-10-11T11:46:00.000-04:00

I was talking with one of my friends a couple months ago and said something that I thought was true at the time but I just couldn't find where I had gotten it from.

I told him that I had read that unbelievers who never have a chance to get to know God but who know instinctively good could go to heaven. Now after I said this I knew something was wrong about it and needed to go back and reaffirm what I had stated. I even thought I had a few verses to back it up. However. After doing quite a bit of extensive searching and a bit of thinking, that just doesn't make sense.

The biggest argument I have against it is that God knows when we are willing to know Him. Is my God so small that He wouldn't send somebody to tell that person about Christ??? No way. If someone who doesn't know God is looking for answers and seeking wholeheartedly, I know God will put the right person in his path.

Why would I not see that before?

I have a couple of ideas. 1 So that I'll admit I was wrong, and maybe put my pride aside. (Maybe...) 2 So I will search His Word to find answers, as well as learn a few other things along the way. 3 Sometimes I fall asleep while I'm reading, so there is a possibility that I was also imagining what I was reading. Which is VERY dangerous. As I so aptly showed in my so called "knowledge" what I thought I had learned.

Which gets back to that I actually base my opinion on this matter in Acts 10. It's the story of Peter while in Joppa and a Roman officer named Cornelius. He believed in God but knew nothing about Jesus, and had received a vision to invite Peter into his home. At that time it was against Jewish law for Peter to be associated with Cornelius and Peter admits to being rather uncomfortable in his house, but Peter has this wild urge to tell about Christ anyways. It says in 10:44 "Even as Peter was saying these things, the Holy Spirit fell upon all who were listening to the message."

What I get from this is that Cornelius could have gone on living his life being devout to God. But that wasn't enough for God. God wanted him to experience the freedom of Christ, and with Cornelius' willing heart, He sent Peter across thousands of Jewish laws that no one understood that they didn't mean anything anymore.

It means that God knew Cornelius was willing to accept Christ, and put Peter in his face to tell him about Jesus. There was no oops or well, Cornelius will find the answers himself, no, Peter was specifically placed in front of him. That's no oops.

And I know this time, I wasn't sleeping the million times I have read this chapter.

Although now I can rest easy that unbelievers who are seeking will find God in their face; it also gives me a greater ambition to be the one in their face armed with God's Word.

And I know it was only a mistake, but I also know I am responsible for double checking before I say anything, even if I am saying it to other believers. And for that I am truly sorry.

2006-10-09T14:08:00.000-04:00

I've seem to have gotten a free day today.

I woke up expecting to be taking care of Oliver, but as it turns out he and his family are still out of state. And I was all prepared to take care of him today. I'm not sure if I'm disappointed or excited. Probably both.

I haven't been praying to get involved or anything, but in last few weeks, well, it's just been weird. Like looking for houses in Lansing has opened thousands of doors for me and my family (as well as shut many others). I was planning on joining a woman's bible study, but it was bad timing and I was sort of bummed that it didn't work out. I let it go, figuring that I wasn't meant to be there. So a friend of mine just yesterday asked if I wanted to join her study, which is at a much more convenient time and not only that but it has several women from different churches, not just Riv, attending. That is something I am very interested in.

The reason I am interested in studies filled with people from other denominations is because I feel as though Christianity has been ripped apart by minor differences and I would like to see them tied all together as one in the body of Christ. I think it's possible. In fact, I know it's possible.

There is only one God and there is only one Bible. The difference is there is many interpretations of God and His Bible, it just depends if the men who did the interpreting knew the heart of God, or were putting Hebrew words in Americanized English format. God and His Bible are still the same.

So we'll see how it goes.

Fantasy Football

2006-10-06T03:49:00.000-04:00

The thing about fantasy football is that the guys watch more football than just their team. Take for instance, they have a guy on their fantasy football team on the Packers, it's not that they like the Packers, but they have one guy that they watch the entire game to see how many points he racks up.

Usually this is while they are logged into their fantasy site and watch as the statistics roll. They have to see it when the numbers go up on their site.

Josh happens to be in first place right now. Which is all and great. But whether he is in first or 10th, I still find out more about football than I ever knew about.

I'm one of those girls who understand what guys are talking about when they talk sports. I really don't mind that Josh is into football. I'm being honest here. It gives him something to do and think about besides the usual daily things. He never had a hobby until he got into football. And although he can go overboard on all that happened in one day (as in anything), if I feel I can't give my full attention to him and his sports, I tell him. That's what marriage is about.

Can we not talk about football for the rest of the day?

Okay but this one last thing before we're done...

Okay, (as if it's a treat to tell me one more thing before we're done talking about it)

Seriously, get serious about communication in your relationships, especially if you're married.

I had an interesting thing happen in the last few days. Josh and I happen to have good communication skills. If he is talking too much and interrupts me, I tell him. Same goes for me, if I'm being stubborn about something, he tells me. We just communicate really well.

In the last week I've had several instances where people are questioning our ability to communicate, stating that Josh always has the upper hand in the relationship. Which is not true. Although I'd like to say I have supreme authority in our marriage, I have just as much say in what goes on in our lives. Sometimes though, I give up my rights because Josh may be better in one area that I am weak in. Or visa versa. Such as the girls and their education. I make sure they are learning what they need to and put into action. Josh takes on the school itself. He's the one who gets involved with the school (PTAs) and communicates and works out any problems with teachers or other bodies of people. That's because his strong suit is communication and the ability to get things done. My strong suit is to encourage and re-enforce or correct ideas learned while they are out of my reach.

Marriage is like that. Josh and I usually have talked out situations and problems way before they even happen. We're planners. And in the rare occasion the issue hasn't come up, we talk about it later. Usually Josh takes over and I listen to the background noise, watch body language and observe.

Josh is definitely the talker between the two of us. I am just not good at communicating what I mean, when I'm talking with other people. And Josh knows that. Usually we agree on things.

Although it may not seem like it, there really is an obtainable goal of awesome communication between a man and his wife. One of the major keys to a marriage is honesty, hasn't that been beaten into the ground? But it's true. The second, is being available to give your spouse your full attention to what's important to them and talking out issues as they arise.

So when I ask, can we be done talking about football? It's letting him know that I would be disrespecting him by tuning him out because I just don't have the will to listen anymore. It's that simple.

2006-10-05T11:46:00.000-04:00

My girls love their cousin, Oliver. Dar was just showering him in kisses. Just a few minutes ago I found Laurel talking to him, and he was intently listening to her, as if he knew exactly what she was saying. He seems to be doing really well, progessing from milestone to milestone almost like he is the 4th child. I'm really excited that he has this opportunity to be with us, and he's taking full advantage of it.

Which on the flip side, he's also taking full advantage of the girls getting toys for him. And just being lazy. Being that he is the firstborn in his family, he better enjoy it while he can. It doesn't last long, let me tell you.

For me personally, taking care of 4 kids is challenging my boundries as both a mom and an individual. I now make sure I take out time just for Mel, so I can be refreshed for when I do have all 4. Before I started taking care of Ollie, I was just squeezing it in when it was convient. If I was taking it at all. Now I tend to get up earlier so that I'm able to take care of myself before the rest of my day starts.

I filled out my applications for a few coffee shops in the Waverly area. I am planning on visiting a few others while I'm up there, just to see if I can get some weekend hours. I'm not really in it for the money, but just to re-establish who I am as a person. Actually it's more so I get adult conversations back into my life. I want to start talking to people on a normal basis again. I'm excited and scared, because I never know where something like this is going to lead me.

So if you think of me this next couple of days, put in a prayer that I will have the confidence to put in for those jobs, and seize opportunity if it arises. Pray that He will put me in a place where I can glorify Him the most.

Yeah. Exactly.

I get cake

2006-10-04T12:10:00.000-04:00

We sort of surprised Josh for his birthday. Well, he knew he was getting a cake, but he didn't know I was going to surprise him with it while we were at his brothers house. Come to think of it, his brother didn't know either. Actually, I didn't know that I was going to surprise him at his brothers house. I surprise myself all the time. Or rather, do a lot of things, spontaneously.

I asked him earlier what kind of cake he'd like and told him I was planning on buying one (I'm really not a cake baking type... In fact I'm really not the celebrating birthdays or holidays type either). Mom and I figured we would just celebrate when Josh got out of work. However I forgot we were going to look at houses last night, so it really wasn't feasible to have a party here.

So I baked a cake.

And then had to decide whether I should surprise him at work or surprise him at his brother's house. It just seem to work out better that I waited until after we looked at the houses and went to pick up the girls. The girls kept asking, "Mom? Can I have some cake?" "You have to wait for Daddy to get some cake." "Are we eating cake now?" "No, Dad is not here." "Who's birthday is it, oh yeah, it's Daddy's. I get cake."

Josh had to pick up his car from work after looking at houses, so I had a little time to rush over to Barn's and light the candles. However, do you know how long it takes to set up and light 27 candles? I realized that the lid of the dish had stolen frosting off the top of the cake, so I had to refrost it. Then I counted out the 27 candles. Josh pulled into the driveway at this time so Melissa sent Barney out to distract Josh, while Laurel, Dar and I set up the rest of the cake. Laurel and Dar were chirping about it being Daddy's birthday and we were surprising him with a cake. After I shushed them, I told them it was a secret and they were not allowed to run to the door and let Josh know of our surprise. By the time I got that concept across, we finished putting the candles in the cake. I had half of the candles lit when I realized the first few candles had started to tip over into the cake. 5 matches later, I told the girls to tell Josh to come inside. "Come in Daddy! Come in!" The girls beckoned. He walks in the door and the first thing he says is....

I smell candles.

27 candles abstractly placed on homemade chocolate cake, with us crooning the usual Happy Birthday tune. Nothing spectacular nor slightly out of the ordinary. But the girls, all the same, were so excited to be a part of the birthday surprise.

They just wanted cake.

Poptart for breakfast anyone?

2006-10-03T08:49:00.000-04:00

The fear of every mother is the fated question.

Why does Oliver have a pop-tart???

What?! I exclaim.

Evidentially in the rush of Josh's happy birthday bliss, and several versions of happy birthday later, Cassie slipped Oliver a pop-tart for breakfast. This kid is already allergic to several things, and with all the good stuff that is in a pop-tart, I wouldn't be surprised if we found something else he is allergic to.

Only a 2 year old would give a 5 month old a strawberry milkshake pop-tart.

Horizons

2006-10-03T01:07:00.000-04:00

We went to the party and Laurel did great. There was a couple there that brought their 2 puppies and she didn’t freak out. It was amazing.

I realized I haven’t been writing. I’ve been busy, but that’s not really an excuse. If I had wanted to write then I would have made time to write. Right?

Today is Josh’s birthday, give him a call, send him a card. We have been house hunting and today we are double checking some houses, and hopefully putting in offers. It’s crazy to think we’ll be in a house again. I’m curious to see where it will lead us.

I like to over-think things, and it’s hit pretty hard in the last few weeks. When I over-think, I don’t just let myself enjoy where I’m at. I just worry about nothing, really. Nothing.

So I’m reading this book about how Christianity compares with Buddhism and Hinduism. The author was born in India, and is a Christian although I’m not sure if I agree absolutely with all of his theories, but his concepts are going the right way. Although he travels worldwide, he doesn’t quite understand American culture. Sometimes he takes a culture thing and he doesn’t quite get that it is something that is meant to be funny or strike you odd. But reading his background of India is fascinating. It feels like to me, that where I live, you get a broad spectrum of Christianity. Christianity, I think is a majority religion in America, although I can’t verify that. However, in places such as India, there are a lot of religions that battle with other concepts of religion than the one we so universally call Christianity. It was something I never really considered being that I live here in the US. Not seriously enough anyways.

It broadened my horizons, I suppose you could say.

2006-09-23T06:31:00.000-04:00

Laurel came home yesterday and told me,

"Mom! I wasn't scared of the dog! I like cats. I'm not scared anymore, I feel much better."

Translation: I can't keep my thoughts in focus but I'm pretty sure I'm not scared of the dog at school anymore. Even if I am still scared, I'm trying reverse psychology to convince myself and the whole world around me.

We will see. We're going to a tailgate/Josh's work party tonight and they have a really big (although calm) dog.

But Mom, I don't want to go to school.

2006-09-22T09:29:00.000-04:00

I've been talking with Laurel about what you do when you are scared. I've been telling her to pray when she is scared of something. So today she finishes her breakfast and tells me she wants to stay home with me today, not go to school.

"Why do you want to stay home?"
"I'm sick, I want to stay home with you."
"Where does it hurt?"
"My... arm."
"If your arm hurts I still have to send you to school."

We went around like this for a good five minutes and then told her that if I let her skip school that I would get into trouble with the law. So I got her out of her pj's and when she realized I was going to send her to school anyways, she's quickly says,

"Mom I don't want to go to school, there's a dog there and I'm scared."
"What do we do when we are scared?"

She fumbled around with this. So I took her into my room and we prayed about it, I cried through the entire thing. After we closed in prayer, she was more than ready and excited again to go to school.

With Laurel you never know what she's thinking, if perhaps she was imagining a dog or if she saw one while sitting on the school bus. So I called the teacher just so she was in the know that Laurel was deathly afraid of dogs. Her teacher knew that there was a dog across the street that usually it barks at the kids while they play, and sometimes it gets loose. If Laurel saw it barking or running around, she would have been definately afraid. She's the first to climb up the nearest adult whenever a dog is around.

It's much harder to be a parent than to be the kid who goes to school to deal with their fears.

Ungodliness

2006-09-01T05:55:00.000-04:00

I woke up around 4 in the morning today just thinking about things. Actually, all night in my dreams I've been fighting with the thought of being able to prophesy. I know a woman who I held in high respect, that had this gift of prophesy. And I thought at first my struggle was that our prophesies coincided. But I think the real struggle was that they didn't coincide and I wanted to know who was actually Godly.

I think I know the answer, and I don't like it.

So it got me thinking of other things, which woke me up at 4 in the morning.

I've been running around with this verse swirling around my head:

For those who are according to the flesh and are controlled by its unholy desires set their minds on and [a]pursue those things which gratify the flesh, but those who are according to the Spirit and are controlled by the desires of the Spirit set their minds on and [b]seek those things which gratify the [Holy] Spirit.

Romans 8:5 (AMP)

I've been reading this book called Under God, which is a collection of 1 to 2 page short stories about the American Forefathers. The amazing thing was that it happened to famous people who I never thought of as Godly people, just history. Makes it a little more real the people who lived before us.

The point is that these stories are about God and his amazingness to still work in the lives of men after the Bible era. We read about unreal stories in the Bible and never think it could happen after that. It's far and few in between. But He does work in the lives of ordinary men, knowing full well who they will become. Makes me want to have the faith like those men.

And thus the struggle with my ungodliness. I know my fight through the night wasn't about prophesy at all. It was gearing me up into the right direction, to think about God first and then think what I could be doing better. About the strong kind of faith I could have.

And deep down, somewhere I do have that kind of faith hiding inside of me.

Lost

2006-08-30T13:41:00.000-04:00

I felt like such an outcast in the room full of kindergarten parents. I was by far the youngest. And who is going to listen to a young mother???

I keep thinking about 1 Timothy 4:12.

Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.

I always feel like I'm too young for this or that and when I get there I wonder why I didn't just attack it when I had the passion for it. I know I am held back by this boundary and I don't know how to step around it.

I guess where I'm getting at is I'm afraid to step up to the podium and just get out there.

I've been thinking about applying for a job at a coffee shop (or something of that likeness) just on Saturdays. Simply to get out there and be myself without my kids. I don't want to solely be defined by my kids, and it feels like I'm starting to get lost in them. I know I have my own person inside of me somewhere. I need to start new relationships and start talking with other people outside of my little world. Badly.

It's time.

I Survived My Wisdom Teeth.

2006-08-29T23:16:00.000-04:00

By the way, I did survive my wisdom teeth. Not that it's any big surprise. I am still alive. I think I've finally caught up on all of my things I wanted to do and just hadn't had the time nor energy to do them in.

I need a t-shirt or something. Like I survived Katrina, only, I Survived My Wisdom Teeth and a massive flu bug to boot.

We had a flu bug epidemic here. There was one day that Cass, Dar, and I were passed out on our living room floor just exhausted and feeling like crap.

Laurel made sure we were all okay and stole my pillow.

What can I say her heart was in the right place and her head.... well... was in my place. On my pillow.

Now that's love.

The Kindergarten Cop-out.

2006-08-29T22:30:00.000-04:00

Laurel is starting Kindergarten.

As I sat in the room full of parents with kindergarteners, you could see who was the first time kindergarten parents (the ask a million questions, sit in the front of the room kind), the baby of the family kindergartener (low riding in the back row), the parents who didn't really care (folders still sitting up on the front table for said kid... poor kid), to the hyped up well I've got an extremely important job, you're just lucky I made time for you parents (which happen to be the same parents who are telling you all about how much smarter their kid is comparatively, even though they don't have time to spend with them. Yet another... poor kid.)

I sat in the middle by force. Josh made me. I wanted to sit in the back. But I'm suppose to be a first time, teary-eyed, my poor baby is leaving me, kindergarten parent in the front row. Am I just odd and screwed up? Maybe I just take it in stride. Maybe I just don't care. She's starting to make her own decisions. She is able to step on the school bus by herself. She's excited. I'm excited for her, but I'm just not the crying kind of empty nest parent.

Am I really the kind of parent that is saying why aren't you eighteen and on your own already?

I love my kids. I instill in them that independence is important. Not that discipline and rules aren't equally if not more important. There's a balance. They can do things by themselves and be who they are. I love that they are comfortable with being independent from me. I'm not scared that it'll backfire on me when they are teenagers. If it does, it's meant to be. No parent is perfect and I don't expect nor want to be the "perfect" parent.

I'm just me. And they will be them. I hope that I've taught them well enough to go into the world and do what's right. But they will make mistakes and I will pick them up, brush them off, put their shoes back on and push them out the door again. They have to make mistakes to learn.

Let them live. They are God's children and He's watching out for them when they are out of my reach, or even when they are in my reach (sometimes especially so). They are the lucky ones. God knows what He's doing. And I gladly give my children to God.

So be it.

One step closer to becoming their own unique independent (hopefully well-balanced) adults.

To which the other parents look at me and say...

Poor kids.

Worrier

2006-08-08T12:19:00.000-04:00

I've been in denial.

I have to have my wisdom teeth out this Friday. Any prayers would be appreciated.

The denial is that they are going to be done, and that I'll survive. Alright, I know there is almost no chance that I'll die from this, and millions if not billions of people this year alone have had their wisdom teeth pulled. I got to listen to all sorts of stories of the pros and cons of having them pulled. Since I am always the last to do things like this, (latebloomer) I can learn from other peoples experiences before it ever happens, (i.e. plan for the unexpected that happened to them). So the following is the million thoughts going through my head; I tried to simplify by putting them in a list (in the order of thought process) that I'd like to call...

Things I just don't want to deal with:

I don't want to spend the money, it feels like such a waste.

With how unpredictable the recovery time is, am I going to spring back or am I going to have to have Josh around to help me with Oliver and company on Monday?

Will I be able to stand soup more often than one meal a day?

My mom won't be in the state, so even she won't be able to take care of the girls.

Will Josh be able to take care of the girls???

Will the girls be good?

Will I be out of it?

I've heard that the drug they give you for the surgery usually causes depression, what if I go off the deep end???

What will my cheeks look like all puffy?

Am I worrying for nothing?

What if I'm that .01%?

Is this worse than labor? Or pregnancy for that matter (which was worse for me)?

Will I feel any better (or different) after they are out?

What's the real reason I'm doing this for anyways???

What can I say, I'm a worrier. But now that it's all out, I don't have to deal or deny it anymore.

I can just face it.

So unreal.

2006-08-08T09:43:00.000-04:00

It looks unreal, but it happened. Not once but twice. I told my sister-in-law that I heard that dimes wouldn't stand on end because the weight of the head was heavier than the tails. So she proved me wrong. Again, not once but twice.

We figure that the table had to be slanted for this to happen. We told her she can now quit college and have it become a full time act.

My sister-in-law, Sam. Dime Extraordinaire.

Mel Pung

2006-08-07T11:10:00.000-04:00

Sometimes I write a ton just to get out what I need to say for the day. I noticed that when you googled my in-laws together, my blog comes up. But when my name is googled, only the birth announcement for Laurel and Cassie come up (what happened to Dar, we don't know).

We figured that I just never put my name together on my blog. Mel Pung. Or Melanie Pung, equally.

Even my sister-in-law google shows up with my blog. And I'm not complaining. It just seems rather odd to me that if someone wanted to find my blog, they'd have to google someone elses name to find it.

So now, maybe someone will find me.

You know, in cyberspace.

NLT

2006-08-03T14:38:00.000-04:00

You know how you want something, and you're just not willing to pay the price? You think, do I really need this? And if you have time, you go by the store and visit your item several times before you justify the cost. Sometimes you get lucky and the item goes on sale. Or you can order it for a lower price online. Then there's those times in the unfortunate event that the item you desire just goes out of stock.

Mine was a New Living Translation Bible with a study guide at the bottom. Besides the fact that I have been struggling with the set-up of my own NIV for quite some time, I couldn't justify paying a pretty penny for a new translation. I kept thinking, what about all the people who are poorer than I am, who can't even think about spending that much on bible? There has got to be some way to get a good version with study guides or devotionals, anything to help each person out there. And I'm not saying just the NLT, I'm saying whatever version is best for each individual. Whether it be NIV, NLT, KJV, New Jerusalem, or whatnot. Whatever the cost. I'm sure there are foundations out there doing this for other people, how many people are going to ask for a free NLT because they can't afford one????

So as I shelled out the dough for this bible, I avoided looking the cashier in the eyes because there was guilt in my extravagant purchase. Yes, it is true there were much prettier bibles in the store that I would have loved to use, payed double the price, and added all the bible accessories (the bible bag, the nice pen, the amazing Jesus notebook to fit in the bible bag). It just happened to be the first bible I've ever bought for myself.

So think about that, in the 5 maybe 6 versions I have, this is the first I've bought. If I paid for all the bibles I have, I could have paid off a credit card. I would have been going into bible debt. And until you actually go out and buy a bible, you think, 'yay, they gave me a free bible, now what?' Let's think about that for a second... They gave me a FREE bible. All those people who gave me a bible for free, weren't from some foundation or organization. They were my friends and my relatives.

All paying their pretty pennies so that I could have a version that I could easily understand and finally get the message.

For free.

Relationships

2006-07-28T09:15:00.000-04:00

I just received an email from a friend that I lost contact with for a while. She was one of my best friends in high school, but as we moved away from the area, we kept very loose contact with each other, sending emails every once in a great while.

However, she is going through a rough time in her life. Which made me wonder... What other reasons are we here on this earth if we aren't here for our relationships???

Everything we are made up of are because of relationships. They are so important. Everywhere you go is composed of people you know, your workplace, your church, your family, your school, even your local Chinese restaurant, all based on our need and natural inclination to build relationships.

I always wonder if I am being a good friend to my friends. If I am able to give them what they need out of our relationship. Right now, I feel like I'm a failure at relationships. I feel like I could have done something to help my friend out, I could have been there for her but then I stop and think; well, God put me here to be her friend now, not when I felt she needed me most. There must be a reason.

And God severely wants a relationship with us. He wouldn't of sent Jesus, if he still wanted meaningless sacrifices on altars and ritualized prayers. He sent Jesus so he could have a relationship with us. I know it sounds really ridiculous, but it reminds me of puppy love that couples get when they first date. They turn a blind eye to each others faults and while it's not a good thing sometimes, I think God is like that. He has a blind eye for us, because Jesus came and took away all of our faults. Our mistakes. So he could have a clearer relationship with us, without looking at all that is wrong with us. I think that's pretty cool.

I wish it were so easy with my friends here on earth. I desire to be a better friend to them. Even if I'm hundreds of miles away from each one, I want to know that they are okay, and still here.

So within the next few days I'm going to visit my friend who sorely needs help right now. That's stepping out of the box for me. She lives a few hours from me and I know (somehow) it's just one of those things I need to do.

Joyce Meyer Conference

2006-07-20T09:24:00.000-04:00

I've been up to a lot lately.

Last weekend I went to a Joyce Meyer conference, and it was good. She always has a lot of good things to digest (and I mean digest) that we all just need to hear. This weekend was on the theme of Religion vs. Friendship. To sum it up, it took a closer look at our personal walk with God versus the regular same old la-te-da of going to church on Sundays. How to intergrate Jesus into our lives and not suppress the urge to include Him in other areas in our lives as well. Thank goodness she did not just do a do/don't list, (some preachers do this) she outlined how Christianity can become legalistic and ritualistic when Jesus plainly tells us to step out of the religious box.

Does this sound like a film rating or what?

I give it 4 1/2 stars.

I'm not a fanatic about speaking in tongues. Some people believe in this heavily, but personally I think it's every man for himself. If it helps your walk with God to speak in tongues, I'm all for it. Maybe I'm just too comfortable sitting in my box labeled "Walk with God" to venture out and pray to speak in tongues. But I see no reason to do it on a regular basis. The Holy Spirit is connected to God, they are one. Why would the Spirit need a way to communicate to God, if he is so tied? I really haven't studied it in the bible, so take this with a grain of salt.

A lot of times I see it as distracting, I have a hard enough time trying to focus on what I'm doing, let alone having people around me speak in other languages that I don't understand. I find that I try to understand their languages, instead of focusing on what's important... praising and worshiping God. Maybe that's why I don't even bother trying, simply because God wants me to worship Him, which I don't do enough of to begin with. I don't let myself.

These are all things to consider that I really don't want to get into at this time in my life.

The point was that during the conference she asked everyone to stand and try to speak in tongues. So in the 15 thousand people, I found myself silent in a stadium full of people talking in unintelligible languages, watching people around me like it was some weird B-rated movie. Besides being that it was an awkward feeling, it was interesting to think; How many think they are Christians because they believe they can speak in tongues? Is my walk barren because the things I believe are boxing me in? Is it that I am not open to the fact that there could possibly be more to my walk with God?

What is God looking for? What does He really yearn for in our relationship with Him? What makes Him decide to use us?

There's is only one way to answer these questions which thankfully Joyce hit at the end of the conference. Which happen to be the simplest three words I've heard in a long time. Read the Word. For all those Christians who believe they are christians because they speak in tongues, read the Word. For any one who is searching for those eternal answers that seem to have no end, read the Word. And for people like me, who can't seem to understand the point of believing in God without a why (but somehow still do) - who wants to have God use them in some way and know it is God who is using them (and not the devil) - who wants to be real to believers and non-believers about Christ, and there will be no question when they look at me that they'll think, 'yeah she's the good kind of Christian, the kind of Christian I want to be.'

(meekly said)...maybe we should read the Word too.

Ollie

2006-07-06T09:54:00.000-04:00

So 4 isn't much worse than 3. I wasn't sure how my nephew would react to Aunt Mel. But he's taking it in stride. Better than I hoped. He started to fuss for a few minutes, so I figured, maybe he's hungry, after a diaper change. Well, he wasn't too interested.

Laurel comes in with the pacifier, takes off the top, and sticks it into Ollie's mouth. Ollie promptly falls asleep.

Laurel is going to be such a good mom.

Not only that but the first hour of Ollie was pure bliss.

Not what I imagined it to be like at all.