Ungodliness

I woke up around 4 in the morning today just thinking about things. Actually, all night in my dreams I've been fighting with the thought of being able to prophesy. I know a woman who I held in high respect, that had this gift of prophesy. And I thought at first my struggle was that our prophesies coincided. But I think the real struggle was that they didn't coincide and I wanted to know who was actually Godly.

I think I know the answer, and I don't like it.

So it got me thinking of other things, which woke me up at 4 in the morning.

I've been running around with this verse swirling around my head:

For those who are according to the flesh and are controlled by its unholy desires set their minds on and [a]pursue those things which gratify the flesh, but those who are according to the Spirit and are controlled by the desires of the Spirit set their minds on and [b]seek those things which gratify the [Holy] Spirit.

Romans 8:5 (AMP)

I've been reading this book called Under God, which is a collection of 1 to 2 page short stories about the American Forefathers. The amazing thing was that it happened to famous people who I never thought of as Godly people, just history. Makes it a little more real the people who lived before us.

The point is that these stories are about God and his amazingness to still work in the lives of men after the Bible era. We read about unreal stories in the Bible and never think it could happen after that. It's far and few in between. But He does work in the lives of ordinary men, knowing full well who they will become. Makes me want to have the faith like those men.

And thus the struggle with my ungodliness. I know my fight through the night wasn't about prophesy at all. It was gearing me up into the right direction, to think about God first and then think what I could be doing better. About the strong kind of faith I could have.

And deep down, somewhere I do have that kind of faith hiding inside of me.