Ramble, ramble, ramble.

You know, I notice so many thing about other people, especially people I don't know that I want to just walk up to them and tell them what's wrong. I'll be like the All-Knowing Lady or something, but with a cooler name.

Except for the whole other people don't want to know that they have problems, so they ignore that they are selfish, lazy, the list could go on forever. And since I am not part of the "friend" category or whatever, I would be the worst one to tell them. So I stay silent.

I'm curious why God gave me this gift. To someone horribly blessed with natural popularity, it would be an awesome gift. You could shape millions of people lives and help them change for the greater good. And no one would hate you! What could be better?!

God knows I love to learn these things, about human character in general. And today I just was being outrageously outgoing, I said hi to people that I haven't talked to in years, (before, I would shy away and embarrassingly shuffle my cart around the store) I teased an older guy who was in line with me (when I usually just don't talk to, well, anyone) It reminded me of my dad and my mom and my brother for that matter... Yeah everybody talks and teases (with complete strangers!) in my family, except for me.

Well, today, black sheep no more.

We'll see.

Adios.

Character

Yesterday, Laurel started to tell me about her day at preschool. Before she would cry the whole way home (because she didn't want to leave preschool) and was angry at me for picking her up. So I couldn't get a word out of her.

And you know what she told me about preschool?

That Madelene got hurt and cried, which she did. And she got a bright green bandaid.

She learns a lot there, I can tell.

Actually I went into the classroom and the teacher dismissed them one by one, as the parent came in, so they were all listening to the teacher. Which is really great. So she's starting to listen to other adults and respect them. (Yes very good.)

We just got into this huge thing about discipline just a couple weeks ago, (not with Laurel, with another parent) and it had to do with respecting the adult in the classroom. She didn't believe in discipline at all, and we do. It was really crazy to believe, and we had to stand firm in our belief, that children need to have those rules and guidelines, and when they step over those rules, the guidelines need to be re-enforced. How is it that God expects any less of us? If we let our kids run around without having rules and such, how is that helping their character? I guess building character just isn't important anymore. Well guess what, it is to me, so I'm going to be the one parent that stands out and protests and the other parents are going to hate me and not let their kids come over to our house because they might actually learn some of that so called "character."

I love what I heard the other day about the best parental advice. It was actually Judge Judy who said it, (and I don't exactly believe most things she believes, but the quote is good) And it was (paraphrased, since I don't know the actual words she used): Until your kids are 18, you need to be a parent to them; you have all the time after they become an adult to be their "friend." Your kids will have plenty of friends up until that point.

I know a lot of parents who want to be friends to their kids, and really I wish they could see what it does to their character. I love my kids, but I love the fact that they respect me, and when they leave my house they respect whoever the adult is. I don't have to worry if my kids are being bad by disrespecting who is in charge or the other kids in the class.

And I'm going to be totally jealous of their friends until they turn 18.

Everything

I know I haven't been consistant in blogging, and honestly, I keep looking at the blank blogger screen and sit here for a very long time thinking about what I can write, with my mind just as blank as the screen before me.

It's really chilly here today. I thought that I would welcome the cold for great running weather, but I've forgotten how much it goes straight to your bones and you never really warm up. No, I much prefer the rainy weather to this.

I love Laurel being at school. I love the fact that I have 2 kids to dedicate my time to and that at the end of the day, I get to take a breather, and mom watches the other 2 while I pick-up Laurel. Laurel cries right now when she leaves, because she doesn't want to leave preschool. But hey, there are downsides to everything.

Dar seems to be benifiting from this too, on Tuesdays and Thursdays, it's like she becomes the oldest sister and she's been helping me out and just growing up. It's been nice, actually. She is going to be so excited to go to preschool the year after, since she already plays with kids pretty well (for a two year old).

Yeah this is rather informational, but hey, I can't be everything to everybody.

It's "called" a supply line.

Yeah I forgot about this until mom and I were just talking about it. And my mom thought I was lying, but oh well I'll tell it anyways (it IS the truth, it really happened).

Josh and his dad were fixing the toilet, as I so told you a few days ago or so. So we had to pick up a part to fix it, which happened to be a hose for the water line. So we got it all measured out and found out how many hoses there are for these, which we thought it was standard, everyone we talked to did. (Just goes to show you can't do what everyone does.) We go to check out and this guy runs it across the scanner, and tells my mom the price and all that. Mom writes out a check. "Who do I make it out to?" she asks. "Lowe's." (Yes for 2 bucks and some obscure little cents....) "And what is that part called?" "A toilet hose!" I pipe out. The cashier looks at me and says, "It's "called" a supply line." He must of thought I was a really stupid blonde because he gave me a dumb look.

But I bet really stupid blondes who think they can fix toilets come into Lowe's all the time.

Okay, well it's funny to me and no one else.

So what else is new?

Bob series

We got a new Bob the Tomato baseball, so I decided to take some pictures of it.
 

Bob takes a shower in the morning.


He gets a cup of coffee...


Gets into the car and goes to work...


Joins the rest of the food family for some Preschool applesauce made by Laurel.

They all mourned for the loss of an apple friend, but the applesauce was good, so he wasn't so missed.


I thought that was fried GREEN tomatoes, Bob. You don't want to end up like the apple...


And after an exhausting day, he falls fast asleep.

Bonus

Well one really great thing came out of our weekend, and that is our toilet doesn't rock anymore. However, it leaks now, so it's been shut off for this week until we can get around to fixing it. Hopefully the other one will hold up to the pressure.

I've never been the type of person to make a huge thing out of something little. And I don't just ask for advice like I should, I am just too stubborn, (and proud for that matter.) But when it becomes a problem that could hurt many people, I start reacting and asking for advice.

I hate being an adult most times, I'd just rather sneak away from problems and forget they exist. Josh is not like that at all. Unless it has to do with housework, then he's all for the sneaking away part.

I think we all want to sneak away sometimes.

Like the people I love who turn the other direction when they see Josh and I coming. I find it kind of funny, in a way, and I wonder if it's me or Josh they are avoiding. Why not face us and say I don't want to talk to or see you ever again, or something solid and blunt like that. I doubt I'll cry when I've been slammed like that, but it makes the situation a lot easier, instead of the whole crowd parting like the red sea to avoid us. It gets a little obvious after a while.

And that would be why I want nothing to do with people. I really don't give them a chance to find out who I am, because I find most are too caught up in their own worlds to have room for me. So why bother? I'm just too huge and complicated to be separated into the "friends" category. I'll be honest, you are going to hate me, you'll love me, you'll want to spit at me, and at the same time want to know what I think about something. I just am not a simple person. I belong in the "friends" "enemies" "listener" "You're going to hate me advice giver," well pretty much anywhere, I just have a lot of different things about me. And oh did I mention "hand me over to the devil on a platter, so he can kill me" kind of "friend".

And somehow, the idea of being a hermit still appeals to me. I like me. If someone else does too, hey, bonus.

Yeah, by the way, this isn't a plea for everyone to tell me they like me, (so don't line up all at once) just let me know if you don't, it'll make it easier on both of us.

LOL

Whatever.

Oh that was fun.

To be continued rant

I finally got Josh out to bike ride with me early this morning. We will see how he feels later today. (To be continued)

Don't you just hate to be continues? You wait for so long anyways to see some show and then it has to be continued and you never see the next part until you've seen the first part like 10 times, and finally get to see the second part at the most inconvenient time, but you sit down anyways because you haven't seen it and you want to just get the whole thing over with.

Most times it's just not worth it.

Not that I really watch much tv, because I really don't, but to be continues are just annoying, why not just make a movie instead?!

I can remember going for weeks with 5 to be continues, and that was the summer that my brother and I spent in my mom's boyfriends basement, watching tv and drinking a ton of his pop. And let me tell you, he got off cheap, we were just that easy to please. Anyways, that was probably the most relaxing summer I ever had, watching re-runs of Welcome back, Kotter. And any Nickelodeon show we could get our hands on, (and that was the In Living Color and Saved by the Bell era, which we actually didn't watch, but that's just how long ago it was...)

Yeah I feel old, just for the pure fact that, that particular summer was 10 years ago.

I'm really not that old yet. And I don't plan on feeling old until I hit 80, then I just deserve to feel my age.

I'm done. No to be continued's here.

Phases

Everything I do is in phases. It's so odd. I'm not sure if it's because I just can't focus for more than days at a time on one thing, or I just need to change what I do just that often.

A week ago I was writing out song ideas like mad. Then a couple days later I got into trying to play someone else's music, somewhat proficiently. Yesterday I started listening to new songs, and the songwriting went down the tubes, however I still want to play, so hey, whatever. I always want to play music, so at least that's something consistent.

Craziness.

It is so weird that it is 130 right now, it seems like I just got out of bed, at 8 something this morning. The day has been just that way today.

Oh and I feel so much better today too. I wasn't really feeling myself these last few days, I was half sick, half suffering from a bee sting that encompassed my whole upper arm. Not that everyone wants to hear the story but hey, that's the shortest version I've got. The bee got what he wanted. I suffered. It's all good. Now. I wasn't too thrilled about it 2 days ago.

Wow. I better stop writing before I start ranting or something crazy like that.

Everything today.

Well today is my brother's birthday, you'd think with how far back I can remember, that I would remember when he came home with us. But I don't. Maybe I just didn't want him.

I can remember what our house looked like when I was a year old. Who knows why I decided to take a picture of our living room in my head and my sister coming down the hall. For whatever reason, it stuck.

I always have to get up in the middle of a blog, and this time I danced across the room and got the girls going.

Oh! Laurels first day of preschool is today, so I only have Dar and Cassie. So weird not having Laurel here, but I could get used to it. Josh had a harder time dropping her off than Laurel did. I guess Laurel walked into the room and one of the little girls came up to her and said, Hi Laurel! I saw you yesterday! And they started playing together, talking about how the other girl got to ride a bus. Then another girl came into the classroom and she ran up to Laurel and hugged her. And the three started playing, and I guess the little boy that used to be our next door neighbor was following Laurel around. What a socialite, without even trying! I wish I was so effortless!

Cassie started singing today, it's a lot of muffled words, but at least she is giving it a try. And I can recognize her words, somewhat.

That's it for today.

Hey wait a minute.

Okay this isn't from my running route, but she's so cute, even when spagettified. 

Highlights of my running route, Part 3: The story of Ransom Reed.

Here's the story of Ransom Reed. 


Ransom Reed is the poor man that now lives on the corner of a busy intersection. His body lays in the path of oncoming cars, and his feet get run over every single time a car passes by. I even managed to step on him, last week, quite accidently when I stepped off the road for a car to pass by. Sorry Ransom.

I've heard it told that even way back when, (in the 70s) his headstone (we hope his head isn't getting run over.) kept getting busted because drunk drivers would run into it. I hope Ransom had a really easy life, because his afterlife hasn't looked too good.

However he gets a new tombstone every few years or so, how's that for nice???

Highlights of my running route Part 2.

Ransom Reed 

Highlights of my running route.

The chicken with his head cut off. 

Here comes the sun....da, da, da, da

Wow. It's get back at Katrina day in the world of blogs. Either that or everyone is trying to be like someone else (and no one knows who started it). I can't even begin to count how many I've read today replicating just this.

My view hasn't changed. In fact, I think I might be more annoyed that it's taken a political turn, and that I'm not seeing more politicians out there getting their hands dirty. I really can't say anything, because I haven't given a thing to the relief efforts either. So I'm no better. It's like voting. If you don't vote, don't complain. You had your chance to have a say who is going to be one of the leaders of this country or what miliage will go through. Just like if I decided to give, I could start to complain.

But you know. Is that really the right thing to do?

Ah, seems like I've turned myself into the prime example.

Actually, I did it on purpose. Who cares if there were high percentage of abortion clinics in that area of New Orleans??? I think Jesus himself would live in that area just to have a chance to talk to those people. Isn't that what he did while he was here? I doubt he would go and live with Billy Graham or John Haggy, I mean come on. I think it's a sad thing that we as Christians didn't realize the chance we had to talk to those people before it happened. Not that God "wiped" it out. Like I said. God is just. He knows what He's doing. And if it gets millions of people to look at how frivilous their lives are and start changing.... Hey, whatever. I'm not here to tell God what to do. He already knows what He's doing. I'm going to leave it up to Him.

So for anyone who is clueless to what I've said. I don't believe for a second that God sent Katrina for the damnation of the hellbound. Oh, that was quotable. A Melism. And if He did, (and I'm wrong) that is His choice. While I don't understand why He did it, I understand and accept that it happened. We could go on for years, decades of why it happened. Who knows. And really, who cares what we over-analize. God knew about it, it is in His timing, and that's it.

And if I'm so sure of my faith and get to go to heaven, I just might ask God why it happened.

Preachy

Josh said I was too preachy today. I think it was only because I was talking about a verse instead of life, but hey, it gets like that sometimes.

Laurel has been starting to answer me instead of repeating what I say, which the repeating meant she agreed, otherwise she'd say, no okay. Since she is saying no now, Adara caught on, and can scream no, which always bugged me about kids. I hate it when they start screaming no, or say no to everything. Call me quirky.

Other than that. Nothing else here.

I was reading a passage in Revelations (21:1-4) today, and I read the first part which is,

Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea.

No sea? I thought. Well I guess in new Heaven and the new earth we wouldn't need to drink, and really right now all we are doing by drinking and eating is sustaining our bodies. I have to admit though, food is good. I enjoy my food. I'm curious if God will allow food even though it's not needed. Here is second thought...what if we don't have these desires either? Would that make for a boring heaven?

I'm sure God intends more than us singing hymns all the time. Although...I do love to sing, so really it's not such a bad thing.

The last part of the passage is this.

There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.

Here are my thoughts. The old order of things will pass away. So everything we know and think of as normal will pass, and become different. Not that we won't be able to adapt to it, but I'm curious how it will go. Even if I imagine what it will be like, I will still be surprised.

And I wanted to plan out my future.

What would I do if it were me?

I'm torn apart on what to think about Katrina. First of all I am sick of hearing about it, it's like the recount, it keeps being the topic of the day, and more are dying, just like every other day, just a little more rapid and a little differently than everyone thought they would.

I mostly feel bad for the elderly that lived down there. It seems like in this survival of the fittest world could only think of how to take care of themselves than other people less fortunate. I mean, how many people let the elders on the bus to leave New Orleans in their place??? Or anyone for that matter, and better yet, children. Those who have a chance to grow up and redeem themselves because of this travesty? I hope if I ever am in that situation, I am compassionate to anyone I see in need, even if it endangers my own life.

As for anyone else who had time to get out and didn't take it; is the foolish man that Solomon talks about in Proverbs. They never deserved this, but their own foolishness caused more deaths than necessary. God is just, and that is that. He had His reasons.

I'm curious if they are going to have a New Orleans again. Are they going to leave the city as is, and tell people to move on? I mean how many villages and cities in the long past did we as humans leave behind because of devastation? We just don't do that anymore, and it's not like we have more unexplored land to settle. It will be interesting to see.

That's it. Katrina summed up in 4 short paragraphs filled with slight compassion, justice, curiosity, and irritation. I wonder what I would do if it were me?

That was girly.

Today is our parent meeting for Laurel, and I admit, I'm a little bit nervous myself. It's not that she can't handle preschool, just I'm not sure I can let her go for a day, by herself. If she gets hurt, I'd like to be there to comfort her. But I can't hold on forever, and I don't want her character to be endangered because I (selfishly) want to keep her near me.

It looks like such a gorgeous day out, but I know it is colder than I want it to be. I'm not ready to give up t-shirts and don jackets just yet.

The girls have these flower pot cups, that the straw is in the shape of a flower, and they look so adorable drinking out of these cups. Little girls drinking out of flowers, I don't know, it's just cute. Sugar and spice and everything nice, well except for that one time she....

That was gushy, I guess becoming a mom just made me more girly than I ever wanted to be. I'm not saying chick flicks are my thing, just I have more girlish tendencies.

And I find that I'm loving every second of it.

Officially written off

Yeah I'm not sleeping, this is the first night in 2 weeks. Which is totally amazing that I could sleep like that. I can be quite the insomniac.

It's pretty cold here. Usually we leave all the windows open at night, and finally last night I asked Josh to close them all before he comes to bed. However he didn't so I'm sitting here wrapped up in a blanket about 2 foot thick trying to keep warm.

I am not the shallow conversation starter. But how odd would it be if we started all conversations with philosophical ideas, I mean, really. And it's not like I'm the brightest person alive either, so while I could start an idea, I could in no way, shape, or form, finish it. They have schools for that.

My mom and I had a conversation about writing people off. I never thought of myself being one of those people, but harshly, I am or have been in the past. I had a friend in school that was a consistent liar. Even though I would catch her in her lies, she still lied. So I didn't talk to her for a few years. Then we started to talk again and it started all over again, though she was getting better at her lies. We were friends through high school, and I found I kept feeling like I was better than her, and I knew deep down I wasn't, but I hated feeling like I was. After graduated and got married, I just haven't tried to kept contact with her, and she's gotten pretty messed up. My mom then said something that hurt. I could have been there for her through these tough times. And I started to argue that she was like this in high school and never told me the truth about her real life. So while I could help her, she wouldn't let me, and here in my glory with that condensending attitude of being better, I was the worst person for her.

Today I could do no better. What does that say about my character? I'm easily influenced by my surroundings. By being friends with my consistent liar, I was becoming a really awful person. And I didn't like that. So I wrote the friendship off. And I don't make friendships lightly either.

I always thought of her as more of a project than a friend. How I could help her become a better person. And who was I fooling? Me.

I then began to think why my mom and I had the conversation in the first place. Because I thought I was better than someone who had written me off for a stupid reason. And although I had nothing to do with the situation; it just because I am a part of the Kingsbury family, so I was officially written off.

I had some serious arguing and re-thinking to do. Not only do I hope (selfishly) that God intended for them to learn something new, but I know He wants me to learn something as well.

Running and thinking, thinking and running.

I was thinking a great many things today while I ran. Anything from my brother to where to put an apostrophe. Great, meaning that I was thinking a lot, not exactly the quality of thoughts or anything. Just quantity. Something to keep my mind off of running, and off of thinking how I should talk myself into quitting.

My brother works the morning shift at Marathon here in town. So usually while he is getting ready for work, I'm getting up to run, sometimes I leave earlier, sometimes he's early, it works out, being we've done this for years now.

So I get to the end of the driveway this morning and Jeff is pulling out in his car. Now I know he's going to have some smart comment as he leaves the driveway, it's just common courtesy for our family. So knowing full well I'm going to run, he asks, "Want a ride?" Ha-ha I say back. Although I must confess I seriously thought about it and had him drop me off at the Alward corner so I only had half a journey. In other words, Cheat. Now that's no way to exercise and have benefits. I mean come on.

As I rounded the Loomis corner, I thought I saw a car parked at the next corner (a mile down) with it's hazard lights on, and started thinking of reasons why, the worst being an accident. So I started to ask myself questions that I would ask (checking for clear responses, keep them thinking of things other than pain, until the ambulance came.) Then I started to think what I would say to those questions, got up to the corner, and no one was there. Oh well. No ambulance rides today.

It got me thinking if what I thought was right, for my own reasons or God's reasons. Most of the time what I thought, was for my own reasons, and I thought of ways to support those reasons with God.

Then I thought, what if my reasons aren't God's reasons. Like I prefer a certain person in office, but if I hate another in office, how can I think that the person I prefer to be in God's will and the person I hate, not? I mean they are both in office, and if I can say God must have a reason for them being in there, wouldn't that same reasoning apply to the person I rather not have there? It got me thinking about my so called "facts" on who I think is right for the job, and why God thinks that they are right for the job.

That took me most of the way home.

This is my favorite picture of late. 


My Dara-kins

Anything and Everything

Our neighbor has been doing major renovations to his house, and does it look good. It's a rental, always has been, but the rentees never kept it up. It was in serious need of rebuilding and my neighbor has been doing an awesome job. He's a good guy.

I fixed my bike yesterday, (told you I was a handyman, well woman) not that it was a big deal... it didn't have a tire or breaks. I'm still working on the back brakes, so I know it will work before I get on the road with it. I much rather use back brakes to front, since you tend to flip over when using the front brakes. I have enough non-living things against me, I don't need to make my bike an enemy by default.

Cassie looks so cute in her too small sleeper, I ended up changing her into cute pj's since after a year old, I don't have footie pj's until 4 or so, and by then, they really either hate or love them, you know? So on that note....