Lost

I felt like such an outcast in the room full of kindergarten parents. I was by far the youngest. And who is going to listen to a young mother???

I keep thinking about 1 Timothy 4:12.

Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity.

I always feel like I'm too young for this or that and when I get there I wonder why I didn't just attack it when I had the passion for it. I know I am held back by this boundary and I don't know how to step around it.

I guess where I'm getting at is I'm afraid to step up to the podium and just get out there.

I've been thinking about applying for a job at a coffee shop (or something of that likeness) just on Saturdays. Simply to get out there and be myself without my kids. I don't want to solely be defined by my kids, and it feels like I'm starting to get lost in them. I know I have my own person inside of me somewhere. I need to start new relationships and start talking with other people outside of my little world. Badly.

It's time.