Emotional.

I tried to sit down and write yesterday, but I was so frustrated that I couldn't get anything to come out. So I got what I needed off my chest, and got it solved and everything. I suppose I could have done it earlier; maybe I like the torture.

So I managed to finish up a song yesterday and started to do lyrics!!!!! I'm so excited since lyrics don't come easily to me, I think the reality is that I never really tried, just figured I couldn't do it, after several horrible attempts. I get discouraged pretty easy.

So I cried like a baby when I confronted my mom with a problem I was having. My brother termed Mom and him as logical and me as emotional. Emotional! I thought it was the other way around. They were emotional and I was logical. I was offended at that at first. Women are always viewed as emotional. That ticks me off (Yet another emotion). But my brother doesn't believe that men and women think differently because of our gender. So he didn't mean it like that. I was only offended because I never think I am an emotional person. Let me rephrase that, I don't let myself feel emotions. Not readily. But in that second of wanting to be angry about emotionalism, I was at peace as well. I admitted to it (what I saw as a weakness in my character). I am emotional in the fact that I get into confrontations, I cry. I'm not sure if it's just because I hate strife, and can't handle it, or if I just hate crying just that much. I've given up to myself that I cry whenever emotion comes flooding in (although it's unwanted).

So I'm emotional. Fine. Sometimes. A lot of times. I've just worked so hard in my life to keep emotions out of everything, that I've been denying who I am as a human being. Emotions have their place. And it makes me this totally bland person when I try to stuff them in a box. So while I will try to keep them to a minimum, I'm emotional.

Emotions aren't always bad...